I need some input. I was a WS and am deeply sorry for it all. I feel very used by the OM. He and his family have gone to another church and that church has a revival this week. It has been 3 mos since D-Day and I am still having trouble with guilt and worryiing about what people say about me. <BR>Tonight my dad went to the revival where OM is. On one hand I feel crushed about it because I am afraid that OM's family will think my dad is ok with what he did to me or maybe they will think he thinks less of me. On the other hand, i want to be understanding and not say that my dad shouldn't go to church there at all. I just wish he hadn't gone so soon, that's all. <BR>My husband is very upset, he feels like Dad's going there is like a slap in his face after he stayed with me even thought the A happened. <P>To top it all off, when I called my mother with concern about this , she ended up getting angry and bringing up things that happened in the past, then hanging up on me. <P>The A with the OM and myself was not a typical one. He is a nasty pervert and I didn't realize it until it was too late, but I was terribly wrong for what I did. I know that and my H knows that and what OM is like. <BR>Please talk to us (H and I) and tell us what you think.<BR>Thanks,<BR>wentcrazy

Hi Wc and H,<P>Well, if this OM is not good association, then can you go to another place to worship? You can not control the actions of others. If you have errored/sinned, you and only you can amend your ways. Forgiveness on an A is up to your mate and God. Actually this is one sin that God allows the mate to forgive. Repentance is important to forgiveness so if that is where you are at, then it does not matter what others think. You continue to do what you now know is right. <P>If your H is standing by you that is better than what 100 others think. They can not be ask close as your mate. Also, the other people are not God and they are not the ones the Bible says you have sinned against. Even tho' you may have hurt them by your conduct, the sin was against your mate and God. So those should be your primary concern.<P>Take Care,<BR>L.<BR>

Hi, Orchid,<BR>Thanks for your input. I guess that my main thing is that I wonder if we should be hurt by my Dad going around OM.<P> I failed to mention that OM's wife has been running me down a lot and has even done so to my parents. (On one hand she would run down her husband for being such a terrible flirt adn then say he was used by me.)<P>H's biggest problem with this is that my parents will get to liking OM again (they used to like OM very much, though H knew he was a womanizer-I didn't know that OM was a womanizer, I thought he was a great guy) and then tell me nice things about OM and I will like him again. <P>My worry is that people will think that Dad approves of OM again and doesn't feel badly about how he did me/the affair.<BR>(Dad is a gentle giant and he won't hurt a fly.)<P>I know we can't control where our parents go, so I feel bad for letting this hurt me, yet we both feel betrayed somewhat. <P><BR>Any more input is welcomed.<BR>wentcrazy