So, I added up every age ~ and that means, like for my ex who cheated at 27 and again at 40, I added both numbers... and Chris's W who cheated three seperate times, I added three numbers... so...<P>I added up every single time, and then divided by the number (I'm no accountant, folks, and I'm sure someone else could do a better job! ) and here's what I came up with:<P>The average age of a cheater: 35.67<P>Now, I'm sure someone could seperate out the 20-somethings, often associated with the 7 year itch, and the 40+-somethings associcated with the mid-life crisis' and come up with the two most common ages... so I'll wait and let someone else do it for us, since I have a learning disability in the area of math! {for real!}<P>------------------<BR>~Sheryl<P>And we know. We who have seen. ~Pellegrino

So, I'm sitting here thinking about this, and realize that the way I did it was all back-a$$wards and shows nothing because it isn't REALLY the average age for an affair, although I think it is the median age... jeez... I hate math... someone HELP!!

Dear Nyneve,<P>You did a great job!!!! I have a degree in Mathematics and you did it the right way. <P>Here is the irony!!!!!!!!!!!1<P>My husband was just before his 36th birthday which is what the other number showed. Does this make me feel any better. No it does not. It does somehow make me feel justified though. Is that weird?<P>I am having a really rough day today. I feel very needy and all the responses have made me feel better. Lets do another post and ask for success stories so that I can have hope as well as justification? What do you say?<P>Cleo

OK Sheryl, let me rescue you. I'm not a statitician, but this old country boy can do a little 'rithmatic.<P>First - no fair throwing out any ages. Do you want an average or not? You can't pick and choose which ages you're going to include because you think you know youngers and olders are "disqualified."<P>Now, do you want an average or the most common age? Not the same, necessarily. The most common age is simply the one that shows up the most frequently. In that you first reported the answer as "37.67", I suspect you really wanted an average since no one reported 37.67 - so it can't be the most common.<P>I think you started out OK - add up the ages and divide by the number reported. Yes, count the multiple "hits" from one person as two or more data points.<P>If you want the median, arrange the ages in numerical order and pick the middle one.<P>WAT

Well 35 is the exact age that my wife had an affair so your math is pretty good. <P>If the ages are: 20, 22, 35, 39, 40 then the average is:<P>(20+22+35+39+40)/5 = 31.2<P>Another thing to do is to get the distibution. Make a table like this:<P>Age How many people<BR>20-25 4 <BR>26-30 5 <BR>31-35 20 <BR>36-40 5<BR>41-45 10 <BR>46-50 4<BR>51-55 3 <BR>56-60 1<BR>>60 1<BR>Total 54<P>Or you can get all the ages and sort them:<P>55, 54, 45, 35, 30, 24,...<P>And then you can figure out that things like 90% of the time the age is...<P>If you have a bunch of numbers like 1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1000<BR>then the average is a large number but that is not representative of the data because most of the numbers are small numbers. Send me a list of the numbers and I will do something with them.<P>In your husband's case the ages were 27 and 40 so adding them you get the average age is (27+40)/2 = 33.5. Sometimes that is useful but sometimes not. The 33.5 number would not warn you about the danger age of 40 and late 20's. Maybe a distribution is better. Maybe a whole bunch of people have affairs at age 27 and a whole bunch at age 45. I think a whole bunch have affairs around age 35 (still young) and a whole bunch at age 45 (change of life).

Hi cleo, <P>Honey, you go for it, because {since you're down, don't read this} I am divorced...<P>But...I still consider myself a bit of a success, since I am learning all these wonderful skills to use in my current stb-marriage (I'm engaged)... <P>(((((cleo)))))<P>Sorry you're having a rough day!<P>

Thank you boys!! Dave and Rodger... you've taught this girl with a liberal arts degree (and with that and a dime, well, you know) some stuff!! <P>Okay, I want to know the DANGER ages... so....????

Danger ages:<P>Maybe it depends on the age of marriage:<P>Scenario:<P>Marry at age 21:<BR>Affair at age 23: reason: immaturity, not ready for real marriage<BR>Affair at age 35: reason: See if still attractive to opposite sex, still young enough for fun. The most attractice age for women and men. Maybe the most attractive looks and mental maturity combination.<BR>Affair at age 45: midlife crises, what is life about anyway?<BR>Affair at age 55: Life was tough, spouse doesn't look too great, spouse is sexually challenged. Children out of the house, time to get a new life. <P>Or Scenario 2:<P>Marry at age 35.<BR>Affair at age 35: reason been doing it from age 20-35 so it's a habit that's hard to break??? <P>