Just a quick mail to let you guys know I had a wonderful/depressing/fun/sad weekend. <P>My kids had a blast. All 3 (6,2,1). It was quite the challenge taking care of all 3 at a campsite I must say. Thank god for my 6-year old! She's so helpful and understands how much I need her now. We have grown very close. She keeps telling me what a wonderful mother I am and how much she loves me and knows I will never leave her. <P>On the downside, there were lots of families there and I REALLY, REALLY missed my H. Bigtime. I had a few crying/anxiety attacks. One pretty bad after the kids were asleep (thankfully). A couple of times I just wanted to leave because they were overwhelming me and I needed help (but H wasn't there)... I didn't though - I stuck it out. Kept thinking of H with OW and how I could ever even forgive him if he did want back. It was tough.<P>I'm back now though. Really missed you guys and could have used the support during one of my "down" times. Glad you are here now. Wish I had a laptop...

hurtbyhubby,<BR>what a brave, brave woman you are!!! Going camping with three little ones...a juggling act even with two parents present. <P>You have a fighting spirit...in the midst of your own pain you continue to nurture your relationship with your children and strengthen the bonds. Good for you!! Let them be a haven to you as much as possible. You are doing all the right things. <P>I wish you peace and comfort....<P>calla

Sheesh, Camping! and I'm worried about a little grocery shopping trip .<P>Glad you had some time to get away. Sometimes just being away from home gives you a certain perspective.<P>Also glad you stuck it out...as I am going to learn as well, each thing we do on 'our' own, we will get stronger and it will get easier.<P>BTW, my H is still home. Can you believe we have been house shopping all weekend? Talking to sales people about when 'we' could move in? I have just stood back and let him run with it. It's his fantasy land, I'm just there for the ride. (sometimes I expect to hear Tattoo in the background yelling, da plane...da plane :rolling eyes: )<P>Take care,<P>Cali