Well, I just put my Plan B letter in the mailbox and put up the flag. The mailman doesn't come ‘till late afternoon, but already I haven't felt this liberated since I stopped wearing underwear. <P>Per Steve's request, I asked my wife once more via an e-mail a few days ago to talk to Steve - she has declined this since one session with him last November - and I've not received an answer, despite speaking with her on the phone this morning. It's entirely possible she hasn't seen the message, but I won't wait any longer. I've put this off too long already. <P>She'll get the letter Monday or Tuesday. I don't expect the reaction Rick37 got. I expect to see no reaction. Regardless of when she sees the e-mail requesting her to talk to Steve, the timing of the letter will obviously appear linked to her refusal to participate - as it was intended - I'm tired of doing this alone.<P>I know it'll be a good weekend for <son> and I. We'll hit the pool this afternoon and tomorrow we go to see the Beach Boys (what's left of them) at Wolftrap.<P>WAT

Okay WAT ... I have you on my Plan B letter response radar.<P>Altho you know your wife best, she may surprise you with a unexpected reaction. My predictions for my H's reactions never seem to hit target, he always surprised me, and not in a good way either. <P>Stay strong, we're here for you.<P>p.s. lol ... No undies (commando )??? WAT ... TMI!!!!<p>[This message has been edited by Resilient (edited July 07, 2001).]

WAT,<P>Know that there are friends out here thinking of you and praying for you as you go through the next couple of days.<P>So do you and your son have matching shirts or something fun to wear to the Beach boys tonight? I bought tickets for my older 2 to go to a Bare Naked Ladies concert later this month and they asked if I had bought a ticket for myself, I just kind of looked at them, like what you want your old mom to go along? They said we had fun last year at the Santana (SP) concert with you! I was shocked they had never told me that before!! Enjoy your son and the concert!<P>Keep smiling, makes people wonder!! You definately make us smile!<P>C ya Dawn

Hi WAT!! Ah, you finally join the combined forces of Rick, HbH, and Paint. <P>I'll have to try not wearing underwear sometime, you say it's liberating,huh? Hmmm... Think I'll get a lot of heads turning my way? (I already took off my wedding ring and put it on my other hand - very difficult - but I've already noticed more men talking to me).<P>I agree with daybreak, you may not get the response you expect. Just don't expect anything (like you say) and see what happens.<P>Have fun with your son tonight! Sounds like a blast. I am heading off to the zoo with my 3 in a little while. LOL.<P>HbH

Hi WAT,<P>Ok, now we know a bit more than we should about your U status?!?!? <P>Plan B, this is a turning point for you. You have put your best out there and done good. Yes, now the ball is in her court. Brace yourself, the weather could change. I certainly hope it is for the better. I will be wishing real hard on this end that it has a positive impact. Impact it will have. Time will tell. Remember watch the actions and reactions. Don't go with her flow. You keep your feet planted right where you are. Let her come to you. It is time she see your needs and that of your son. <P>Be brave my friend, you have your son, your pride and your respect still in tact. Also you have the support of all of us here. Enjoy the concert. My favorite song is Cocomo. The Beach Boys are getting along in years and may need help carrying the tune. Sing loud for me. I'll be listening..... <P>L.

WAT:<P>Congratulations on taking the Plan B step. Given your circumstance it was a demon you needed to face. You have done so in your usual fashion: with a twist of humor and dignity.<P>Enjoy Wolftrap, haven't been there since "The King and I" many years ago. Lawn seats or pavillion? In either case, enjoy the (Eroded) Beach Boys.<P>Godspeed,<BR>STL

Good luck! Many prayers for you and son........and wife!

Thanks, L, Jo, Dawn, and HBH (all Ladies!),<P>The letter is still sittin' in the mailbox. I have left it alone all day. <Son> doesn't want to go to the pool, so we set up the horse shoes in the back yard. I'll build some pits next weekend, maybe.<P>I really don't expect much from the letter. Our contact has been minimal already. The effect will be mainly on me to be released from the Plan A mode. I can relax and not worry about LB'ing. She'll not be able to understand why all of the sudden I've switched to always trying to get her to do things with us to saying I can't stand to be around her.<P>When we talked this morning I asked again if she'd like to do something with <son> and I and she declined. She asked to have him Sunday night because she's off Monday. This means <son> could be with her when she gets the letter. Wonder if that's good or bad? STOP IT!!!!!! I'm not supposed to wonder about that!!!<P>WAT

STL and Mother - (Dern, a guy)<P>We were posting at the same time. Thanks for your wishes.<P>Thanks especially to Mother - you were the one who opened my eyes to Plan B a few months ago. It could be long overdue, but it doesn't matter now. I suddenly feel motivated to get back to my real passion - sailing - and to start racing again with my son as crew. I want to try out that new chicken grilling method - maybe tonight! - and dust off my old sauce recipe that I haven't used in years because W didn't like it. Do I sound reborn?<P>Now, about those dern dogs.....<P>WAT

Good for you to have the courage to post the letter! I cannot imagine how difficult that may have been for you. <P>I think it is wonderful that you are already feeling the relief of exiting plan A and moving head held high into plan B. You are truly an inspiration on MB (and elsewhere too I'm sure! )<P>Karen<BR>

Hi WAT,<P><BR>OK Way too much information there. <P><BR>Good luck on the plan B. I still think your wife has a pattern...I think it might be very easy for her to let go of relationships. I know it is a different situation than her last marraige but I get the feeling she might have more of an ability to compartamentalize situations. Like most guys do. But you know her better than I. <P>Hey if you ever need a crew let me know. I am trying to learn how to sail. Not sure if you would want to deal with a newby though.

Hi WAT<BR>I just wanted to add my support for you going into plan B.Best to you and thank you for your advice to me about my plan B as well . I will post my letter soon.8 days left for me!<P>I expect the same reaction as you, nothing. But you never know, and even if it is nothing, we never know what's going on inside their heads.<P>Have fun sailing!!!

WAT,<P>Just wanted to add my support here. You've fought a brave fight. It's not time to think of you and your son. Your wife will make her won choices. Either way you come out of this a winner.<P>Z<P>------------------<BR>He loves not who does not show love.<BR>----William Shakespeare

Dave,<P>Best of luck. I know you have waited a long time for this and I hope it works out. You have always been there for everyone else on this board.

Da** it Dave, you made me laugh again and when I really wanted to pout and be crabby! No underwear---well, that definately fits in the category of WAY too much information!!! <P>As for going into Plan B---it was time, and the fact that you're feeling great about it confirms it.<P>Just be ready for the bumps in the road---I'm praying that the letter really helps your W see what she's missing out on.....

Drat! ... those doggies again, WAT.<P>I'm still thinkin on that one, Hon. If it turns our she doesn't want 'em, perhaps you can place an add in the paper? <P>Go out and sail this week-end! We do it here in Gig Harbor. I rent a 14 foot Catalina, it certainly cleans out the A affects cobwebs.<P>Best,<BR>Jo

Thanks for all the additional support.<P>Jo, per Steve's advice, I didn't confront the doggie issue in the letter. We'll either 1) get to that later in divorce proceedings which should start by late August during which she will get them, or 2) we'll both get them because divorce proceedings won't happen. I can put up with them for a few more months - no need to distract from the real issue in Plan B.<P>I sail a Hobie 16. W and I were very active on the racing circuit before children. We also chartered throughout the Caribbean. A little reminiscing: We went on a charter for our honeymoon, along with another couple who got married on the same day - we had a combined reception - taking with us most of both wedding parties! Three boats with no tan lines. Ah, youth.......<P>WAT

Oh Dave, just wanted to add my support... I'm sorry it has come to this.<P>You've fought the good fight... and hopefully this is one that will become your victory (and hers, she just doesn't know it yet) SOON!!<P>About the sans underwear thingy -- MY EYES, MY EYES!! <P>------------------<BR>~Sheryl<P>And we know. We who have seen. ~Pellegrino

Thanks, Sheryl.<P> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Nyneve:<BR><B>About the sans underwear thingy -- MY EYES, MY EYES!! </B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Did you notice how well my bait worked? Jo, Dawn, and HBH all took it right off the bat. Orchid, not wanting to appear anxious, waited a while.<P>Fun can be found in the most unlikely places.<P>WAT<P>

WAT:<P>Re the dogs: Well, if I remember correctly one was suited to bottle scrubbing. Might work on grills, too. The other ... well, if it is a long-haired breed, perhaps you can shear it and use the fur to knit some underwear.<P>Just a thought,<BR>Godspeed,<BR>STL