Well..it's been a few days...<BR>We ended up getting him a different car on a small loan at a buy here pay here place....he seems really happy about that...now he can come over here all the time except live here!...<BR>It looks like he is slowly moving back into his life??...<BR>I know I shouldn't rationalize...but here's latest actions...<BR>Constant future planning underway...always what "we" will do now...even saying it to my oldest daughter at times too...<BR>He is still having a bit of anger problems towards my oldest...but I think that is because he said some really stupid things during the affair to her and he is afraid she'll never forgive him for them...so he reacts with anger instead of compassion at times...but he has been getting better slowly towards her...<BR>He is great with his son now??...before he could hardly stand him?...<BR>Before he said he was wanting to just spend time with the kids mainly but he has never acted that way?...It looks more like he is jealous of me taking care of the kids??...<BR>He wants me to himself is what it looks like now?...<BR>Hmmmmm....he acts so normal at times now it is scary...<BR>He has begun telling me EVERYTHING he does now...he will call and tell me where he is??...even started telling a bit about what happens at work?(That is where affair happened and he wouldn't talk about his work to me anymore during A and for 2 and half months after it stopped)<BR>We did have a conversation where he admitted guilt a few days ago...<BR>And I already know he does not want me out of his life...he told my friend so...he knows if we divorce I will not be in his life anymore...and he can't live with that...<BR>I've noticed him staring at me while I'm not looking...and talking lustful looks at times here...<BR>Just like in the beginning...it's like we're starting over...he now worries I will walk away completely...<BR>He makes excuses every night for why he isn't coming home?..<BR>Lame excuses like he should be here?...and he knows the excuses are lame...<BR>I know not to let my hopes get up...but it is really hard when they want to spend all free time with you....<BR>And call all the time to see what you're doing...<BR>And talk about the future...everything we'll do...<BR>Promising what we'll do....<BR>Opinions?...and I bet I hear keep the Plan A up!...L..s...just wondering if a bit of hope is okay...<P>

Hi MacGyver,<P>He is answering to you and treating the children better? Those are positive steps. Don't jump up and down yet but you can smile a bit. <P>For me, I told H that my limits were to show love and care for the members that reside in my home. I thanked H for the care he was trying to show us but I was limited to return the same care as long as he continued to exist outside the home. See with my care comes my worry, it stressed me out as long as I thought I had to worry about H's every move. <P>So if you are in plan A and can afford to be there and your H is responding, then you will continue to see a general forward momentum. Answer his questions, see if he can provide reassurance and answer your questions, check to see how your children feel about this progress. Inform your H and watch and wait. <P>I am happy to hear positive news and look forward to more. <BR>Remember: Respect yourself and yoru H will respect you.<P>Take Care,<BR>L.<BR>

Ms. Mac - ditto Orchid. Go slow.<P>WAT