Thanks, Hurtinginil. Your support means so much right now.<BR>Here's the whole sad tale.<P>Original d-day was July 21, 2000. H had 11 mos. EA/PA with <BR>secretary (OW is secretary for H and CEO). H said he wanted <BR>family and wife, said it was over. Surprise! On again off <BR>again A for the next year. Second d-day April 2001. OW ends it again because H will not leave family. Working on recovery again.H absolutely refused to leave job because of his status position he has finally acquired. Suspicions of resumed A started in June, just before our 25th Anniversary. H confirmed suspicions Monday. Said he needed to find himself so he packed up, waited till 13 yr. old son returned from pool in the afternoon and told him he was moving out to find what he wanted. Son knows of the A because H so kindly informed him after first d-day when H was going to leave, that H didn't love mom anymore and found someone else he loved. Too much info. for a 13 yr old.<P>So now I have a very angry son, who is venting that anger directly at me plus I am enrolled in a nursing program this Fall and I am currently taking a required nursing<BR>admittance course which is extremely excelerated to accomodate the summer session. And my midterm is Thursday. On top of the emotional turmoil of the A, my H leaving, the anger and hurt of my son; I also have the emotional stress of school and the reality that perhaps my dream of getting into the program this Fall may be postponed until Spring because I'm finding it very difficult to concentrate at the level that is necessary to pass this course. But I know that my welfare and my family's comes first; my dream will always be there. It may be postponed but it's not dead by any stretch.<P>Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers. I'm hanging on to a hope and a prayer.

I read your post and, although I don't usually post much, I decided to write to you and let you know that I will pray for you. I, too, am a betrayed spouse. My husband had an affair that ended in June of 2000. We are in recovery...but your post really touched me. I am so sorry for your pain.<P>Tammy<P>------------------<BR>A LITTLE kindness can make a big difference!<P>We can survive this!<P>"If I rise on the wings of the dawn, If I settle on the far side of the sea. Even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast". Psalm 139: 9-10

Oh my dear,<P>How cruel of your H to speak that way to his son. Talk about fog. Yes, my H is doing the same thing. Our children and ourselves need to be protected from further harm. While we can not do that 100%, I know as a mom, you will provide reassurance to your son of your love. I just had to break the news to my 6 year old that his dad left. I have not told him that his dad is in jail for a few days, that would be too much. It is too much for me right now, but that is the truth. <P>Is it possible for your son to help you out with your studies? It might seem silly but as much as possible even little things will keep both of you focused on a positive item. It may help a little. <P>Your hurt is soo deep. Please know that others understand and care. Another suggestion might be for your son to write a letter to his father. Children can speak the truth quite clearly if given the opportunity. It helps them release some of that inside tension also. <P>Take Care,<BR>L.<BR>

Aries....<P>You take care of you and that son of yours!! H is deep in fog, and I doubt that A will last, as most don't. For H to involve his son in the midst of all this is absolutely wrong. Treat him with all the respect and love you can. Answer his questions, realize that he trusts you enough to vent on/with you about his father. Don't Dad-bash in front of son, or he will end up resenting you. I know that I am not telling you anything you don't know, just trying to help you focus. I agree with letting your son write letters to Dad, even if you don't send them. Maybe you and son can share 30 minutes a day or three times a week to journal together? Your relationship with your son will flourish since you both need to count on each other now, more than ever. Keep that chin up!! Keep the faith!!<P>*Out of our greatest fears, come our bravest deeds!*<P>Trueheart