My W(WS) admitted to PA with two OM from 07-20-00 to D/D 01-17-01. We enjoyed sex 2x’s a day & at least on one day she was with two OM and me, (separate occasions), although she tried to get two OM together with her, but one declined. She stated that sex was hotter with me after being with one of these guys.<P>She was big on tanning salon during this period. She is back to tanning salon this year. She says it makes her feel better about herself & that many women into their late 40’s even do this. I’m thinking it is not that common & that there may be different reasons, but a “sexual turn on” I’m thinking is a major reason why a women would do this.<P>I’m curious, what do you think, how common is this full body tan, particularly for married women in there mid to late 40’s, who are not in the entertainment business ? Also, what do you think about if a “sexual turn on” is a big part of it?<BR>Thanks for feedback!<BR>HH

HH....<P>I work in a health club, and have for several years. Our club has two beds in it, and I can tell you that most of our patrons are middle aged men and women, and from the conversations you hear in the club, most of both sexes tan naked. I would be leary, I guess, given your W past track record, but in and of itself, the behavior is not all that strange. Hope this helps. <P>Trueheart

Well, I do not, but I have 2 friends that do...Oops, only 1 is married; the other has no H, sig other or even dates. They say it makes them feel better abt themselves...more attractive etc. One says that tan cellulite simply looks better???<P>Kathi<P>

Well I all body tan. I'm not in my late 40's but I'm in my late 30's and married. I tan in the summer because I have darker skin that tans easy and also tans a great color. I work full-time so I can't just lay in the sun. I get stopped in the hallway (by women so it's not a pick up a man thing) with comments about how pretty my skin color is. I feel good about it....I do it for me. I also think legs with some color look better in shorts then real white legs. A sexual thing? Nope.

Hi Hurrian Hoosier,<P>I am not 40 but I have done the all over tan in tanning beds. I do it durring the winter months. It helps me not get depressed and want to sleep all the time. I did it while living in Finland. I could not deal with the darkness and the tanning bed helped me a great deal. <P>My guess is your wife might not be feeling desirable and going through a mid life crisis. Women when they get older are led to believe that they are not attractive and not worthy anymore. Look at movies...a woman turns 40 and all she can get is mother role. Men well into their sixties are still consideres sex symbols. That is my guess she is doing this to fill her self image by thinking she is still young and sexy.<P>Maybe validate that you think she looks hot. I know it is hard coming off an affair but women worry about looks more than men.

I do! In my back yard, too. It feels good and,well, Robert kinda likes it, but that's not my primary reason. And I'm over 40. <P>I think it's pretty common....most folks I know tan naked in the beds, men and women of all ages.<P>Lori

I don't tan at all, either in salon or on the beach. I am 46 years old and my skin is that of a 32 year old.<P>Your W may be buying some "sexual turn-on" now, but when she's in her 50's and looks like she's 70, she may regret it.

I'm with the last post plus- sunscreen, sunscreen, sunscreen - I'm 42 but don't look it. I use awesome self tanning lotion which looks fabulous! As for all body tanning - oh gawd, my breasts are saggy enough after children, can you imagine well tanned and wisened up saggy ones at 72?? <P>But on a more serious note - SKIN CANCER!! Ever heard of it?<BR>Okay so the back of my neck is peeling from being out in the garden too long before I put sunscreen on! Guess I should walk my talk.

Alberta,<P>What self-tanning stuff do you use? I don't care for being outside in the sun long enough to tan, because I burn very easily... but, of course, my fish belly white skin is not particularly attractive when everyone else is nut-brown!<P>I guess I would have to attribute my younger looks to not being much into tanning even in the sun - I am also 42 and am regularly told I look like I am in my early 30's. Never have done parlor tanning, and I doubt I ever will. But I'd sure love to get a recommendation for a good self-tanning product.<BR><P>------------------<BR>terri<BR><B>Courage</B><P>Whatever course you decide upon,<BR>there is always someone to tell you<BR>that you are wrong.<P>There are always difficulties arising<BR>which tempt you to believe that your <BR>critics are right.<P>To map out a course of action <BR>and follow it to an end <BR>requires courage.<P><I>Ralph Waldo Emerson</I>

I never got in a tanning bed in my life until I found about H's infidelity. Yes, it's an all over tan. I like it and he says that he loves it. I don't think I would've ever tried it if he hadn't done this. I did it strictly for myself. I know a lot of women that do tan all over. I have lost 30 lbs, got contacts, blonde hightlights, all over tan, joined the gym and toning everything up and I feel great about my looks right now! MLC? maybe.....<P>NM

Thanks for everyones feedback. I'm probablly overreacting. I did not mean that the actual tanning experience was a turn on. It deffinately gives person a better look in the buff & I have a distinct impression that was a major reason she did it last year when she was carrying on with two young studs (they were 32 & 36 -- her 48) & I was trying to get a feel if this was common insentive -- she works 25 hours a week and has pleanty of oportunity to tan outside -- did not have feel for how important taning butt & breast were to feel good about self?<BR>I mean I like it, but it isn't a must for me & frankly I'm feeling a little insecure about her motives for this look. <BR>MLC? Yes, that is big part of this!<BR>Thanks Again,<BR>HH

TAN PERFECT....best self-tanner I have ever found, and I have tried lots of them.<P>The good thing about it is that it goes on brown, so you can tell how evenly you have it on. Does NOT turn orange either!

terri:<BR>I use a product that I distribute myself, so I'm careful to promote it on a forum like this - don't want to break any rules, policies and procedures. You can email me directly and I can direct you to the website. This is a US based company and you can order online.<P>my email: bsprague@telusplanet.net

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Dazed and Confused:<BR><B>I don't tan at all, either in salon or on the beach. I am 46 years old and my skin is that of a 32 year old.<P>Your W may be buying some "sexual turn-on" now, but when she's in her 50's and looks like she's 70, she may regret it.</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>>>><P>I'm with you DAC! I am 34 but I still get carded if I buy alcohol or go to a bar. I have always been very careful with my skin. My friends are already getting wrinkles and crows feet and I have none. I have no desire to look like someone can make luggage out of my face by the time I am 40. And honestly I have yet to see a woman in her 40 with a deep tan who didn't look like she was one step away from being made into a saddle, no matter how she thinks it looks. Besides, it's cheesy looking. The worst is women with really bleached out hair and dark tans. They look like photographic negatives lol. I do use self tanner to get a glow so I'm not pure white in the summer. As far as the celebs with tans, those all come from bottles. They aren't out there frying their multimillion dollar faces into aged oblivion.<P>

I am with all of you who avoid tanning beds and the sun - not good for the skin! I am a walking example - just had a mole removed on the back of my calf in Feb. that was early(thank goodness) stage of melanoma, then I had to go back and have a 3" slice of tissue removed(now have an "indented" calf, but, hey, it's better than the alternative!) I have tried not to lay out in the sun (if so, with lots of sunscreen) for past several years, so I am paying the price of "frying" in teens, 20's, etc... we actually used to put baby oil with iodine in it to fry when we went to the beach in hs - wish I could undo that stupidity. Tanning beds are supposedly worse than laying out in sun!! Please be careful - melanoma is real! I use self tanner...yes, I miss having some color,but not worth the price. We have a pool in backyard, and I can't even lay out... <P>Susan, where do you get Tan Perfect?<BR><p>[This message has been edited by sobelle (edited July 13, 2001).]