Well here is one you didn't read in the other thread. Even though it doesn't belong in yours, I'll post it anyway.<P> "We got married so young I didn't know what love was. The whole time we've been married I thought I loved you but didn't know what that was. Now I do". Oh yeah this classic too. "I will always love you but I am not in love with you".<P> We've been married for 19+ years, had four beautiful kids,(+ one that miscarried) been through great times and bad times together, more good than bad. <P> D-Day was May 12, 2001 and we are still together. She tells me she loves me(and when she says it I wonder if she knows what love is)but has not as yet told me she regrets saying the things she did. <P> I asked her in early June to marry me again(lol). Turned me down. That hurt to hear. Also pissed me off though. I told her that I would ask her one more time to renew our vows, if she hadn't found the love I know she has for me when I ask the second time, it will be over for me.<P> In the meantime I have been Plan A'ing my buns off. Which is hard because at times I see no results from all my efforts. But I do realize that Plan A is more about me than it is about my marriage. It's to change who I had become before the A happened. <P> I want everyday to ask her to re-marry me, but fear what she may say. I am not at the plan B point yet.<P> BTW she says she has had no contact with the OM since the A came out. I don't think that I believe her though. OM drove by my house tonight. I told my wife I would not stand for that. She swears she has had no contact with him since d-day. <P> If OM only knew how close he is to the grim reaper.......Control yourself Jerry. I hope for all my families sake they leave the country if they start up again.<BR> <P>

Keep A planning...you just started...It's a long way to go, but it's working...

Hi deeplyinlove,<P>Sorry you have to be here but we are a pretty fun bunch, despite our problems. Take life's lemons and make lemonade.<P>But in regards to the 'infidelity handbook'. From what I have gathered, it is still only being published in one language (Fogese) and has been revised many times. The current editions include phrases like: <P>1. Fogese:I need some time alone. <BR> English: I am moving out with the OP.<P>2. Fogese: You don't understand or you don't know.<BR> English: I don't want to tell you the real reason.<P>3. Fogese: Are you going to keep me from seeing my <BR> children?<BR> English: I want to make you feel guilty. I don't really<BR> have a great desire even for my children. <P>4. Fogese: You are better than the OP.<BR> English: I'll tell you what you want to hear but I will<BR> never tell the OP that.<P>5. Fogese: Well, I'm here with you aren't I?<BR> English: So be satisfied with what I give you, it isn't <BR> 100%.<P>Oh, there is more. Again it is difficult to translate the book without the fogese dictionary but no one has ever found the completed fogese dictionary because like the fog, the definitions keep changing. <P>L.

Thanks Orchid,<BR>It is amazing how many of those phrases I've heard, especially #5. would that by any chance mean my W might be in this fog?<BR>What other signs do I look for. <BR>Some of the decisions she is making don't seem to follow her personality type. Is this that fog or am I reading more into it than there is. Maybe this new relationship is really what she wants and my time is over. Maybe this OM is what she really wants in life now.<BR>Big time confussed!!!!!<BR>She said she wished this had never happened but it did and I'm happy now.<P>deeplyinlove or maybe I should say deeply in sh**