I am 20 yrs old and I have been married 2 yrs now we just had our second child. We have been together for 4 years and we both cheated before marriage. and now we always fight about it and constanly think the other will cheat. We simply just don't get along anymore. I recently have found myself very attracted to his bestfriend I literally think about him all day. He does have feelings for me too. We did share a long nice kiss. But I did read the advise and I just could not tell my husband this I know him and I know that would be the end of our marriage. and I don't want it to be. We have been through so much and I really do love him <BR>Please Help<P>------------------<BR>CG

C,<P>I went thru a similar phase after I had my second child too. It was really weird! In my case, it was mainly because I went thru a major transition of my life. I had to quit my job and become a full-time stay at home Mom. It was hard because I went from being surrounding with adults to 2 small children. My husband's best friend would come over, and give me all this attention. At that time, he was single and available. He would flirt with me, and kiss me on the cheek. Nothing more than that happened between us, but I found myself very attracted to him. It really scared me!! I thought what is wrong with me. I too, would find myself thinking about him, and fantasying certain scenarios (if you know what I mean). When he would call, I would be thrilled and even more excited if he would come over.<P>Girl, it was crazy for several months! I thought I can't let this continue because he was coming over more frequent. I had to sort out my feelings for him, and figure out what was going on with me. I back tracked, and realized I was starving for adult contact. I needed to get out and be with people. I enrolled at the local college, and took 2 classes. I didn't even cared if I passed or not. I knew I had to separate myself for a little while during the week, and have some other kind of life than just taking care of the kids & husband. I manage to get myself out of this rut. By the time I knew it, my feelings for my husband's best friend had changed. I was so relieved, and in the process meet some new friends. I found some new interests, and now he has a girlfriend.<P>You may just need some time for yourself. If you are a stay at home Mom, you may want to go to recreation center in your city. Check out the local YMCA, or a good church where there is a Mom's Day out program. This way you can do something for you. Go workout, go to school, or do some volunteer work. This way you can find some other interests, and get out of what I call "Soap-Opera Mode." Anyway, I hope I helped you consider some things. Stay true to yourself. Sometimes things are not always what they seem.