My H and I had another argument about her after a romantic date the night before. Ugh! It's almost quitting time and I don't want to go home. I CAN APOLIGIZE UNTIL MY HEART'S content but he will say that it will happen again. How do I say I'm sorry? Starting planA tonight.

OK, what exactly did you argue about? What do you mean "he will say it will happen again"?

We argued about the OW. He says that is all we do anymore. I need some advice on how to resolve our argument from last night so I can start plan A off on a good start.

OK, how does this feel:<P>I apologize for arguing with you last night. Please understand that this is very hard for me to understand. But I want to understand everything - especially the things I haven't been doing well between us.<P>Close?

His reply: Yeah Yeah until tomorrow night.<BR>Can you give me a response to that?

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by M&J:<BR><B>His reply: Yeah Yeah until tomorrow night.<BR>Can you give me a response to that?</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Your truthful response would be:<BR> <BR> "We'll do this until I get over it."<P>You might try something like:<P> "It will probably take until we see each<BR> other as human beings again, when you can<BR> see ME as a human being, when I see you <BR> as MY human being again. I'm sorry that it<BR> bothers you; it bothers me a LOT but you've<BR> probably noticed that."<P>My 0.02 suggestion, worth what you paid for!<P>Bama

Bama's answer is as good as any. There's plenty more than one right answer. Perhaps look at it from the standpoint of what's a BAD answer, then don't do that.<P>What's bad is to continue the argument and don't try to win. Don't raise your voice and don't make him feel like he's being judged. This is NOT about being right or wrong. Let's face it - he's WRONG!!! Nothing you say will cause him to back down because he's on the defensive and you're on the moral high ground. He's cornered. <P>So, what Bama said, or something like "I have no intention of doing this everyday."

Thanks a lot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

<B>We argued about the OW.</B><BR>DON’T ARGUE with him. If you want to discuss ANYTHING which will even remotely be confrontational/arguementative, DON’T!<P>If he brings up ow, tell him politely you’d rather not discuss it UNLESS you guarantee (to yourself) that you will not get angry at all.<P>Lovebusters. Don’t do ‘em. If you do, apologize immediately, tell him you are trying to stop yourself before you do them and DON NOT DO THEM AGAIN!!<P>Plan A is something you should always do. It is not something you do just because your spouse is having an affair.<BR>If the marriage is on a good footing, then it is okay to discuss things which will get the blood pressure up a bit. But not when there is an affair going on.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A>