Today was my 12th wedding anniversary. I spent it with my sister and her family, celebrating my birthday, which was 2 weeks ago.<P>Five days from now, Sept. 14, will be the 3rd anniversary of D-Day.<P>Even though I am feeling like I am nearly ready to move on, I still wonder what he was thinking and feeling today. And I am sad that he never gave us a chance.<P><P>------------------<BR>terri<BR><B>Courage</B><P>Whatever course you decide upon,<BR>there is always someone to tell you<BR>that you are wrong.<P>There are always difficulties arising<BR>which tempt you to believe that your <BR>critics are right.<P>To map out a course of action <BR>and follow it to an end <BR>requires courage.<P><I>Ralph Waldo Emerson</I>

My dear Terri,<P>Anniversaries are hard, they bring pleasant and sometimes sad memories. I missed my 10th. Very sad for me. I am glad you were able to spend it with your family. <P>You have been such an inspiration to us all here. Will he remember this day? I sure hope so. I will put my thoughts and prayers out there in that direction. Why? To [censored] his conscience, to make him think about a very beautiful and great lady who has helped so many. He really needs to know how great you are....... whether he appreciates it or not is hard to tell. ..... if I could send the LB fairie over there to knock some sense into him, I certainly would. <P>Til then, know that you are loved and cared for by many here. <P>L. <BR>

terri,<BR>I am sorry you will remember these dates like this - I hope soon they will be shrouded with new memories of good things. aftershock

Hi Terri,<P>I just felt the same thing on Sept 1st, Honey. I'm right there with you. It doesn't matter what he did or didn't think cuz those memories are yours so cherish them. His love for you did exist to the degree that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. He Chose YOU, and you him. <P>You have been so strong and taken care of yourself after being thru so much, Terri, and you have helped so many people here, myself included more than I can say. Whenever you post to me I know I'm getting good caring advice. I thank you for that. I don't know if I've ever said that to you and should have along time ago.<P>I know you hurt today, and I'm praying that one day you and I will be able to look back and see we did what was right and true and not hurt so much.<P>Very Best, Terri. I pray for better days for us.<P>Love,<BR>Jo

Oh T, (hug, hug)<P>Maybe not on the day, but I do think at some point (some trigger)these guys do remember us. I feel like I know Frank well and I know at least my H#1 well, and I can't believe they just don't drop the infidel crap for a second and a sad smile crosses over the face.<P>I was reading here today - some update thread. For me, Sept 20th would be 15 years. I feel so out of place here anymore. Yet I continue to learn and I just can't explain to others that this WILL heal in time. I was so majorly screwed up, never thought I'd have "life" again. <P>That anniversary day, it will cross my mind. I will see our young faces, and all our hopes and dreams. How sad that it came to such a brutal end, and we never had a chance either.<P>On D/D you had a last name thread. I could only ask my resident expert his thoughts. He said, "when we met you had a name and I never gave it much thought - it was your name. <BR>When growing up I always dreamed my wife would take my name". I said, "but Tom, your first wife didn't take your name". His response was "I don't care, because you are my true love". (And peel me off the floor!!)<P>NEVER, never, never, when I was living this hell did I EVER think I'd be in that place at that moment, hearing words like that.<BR> <BR>I wish I could fast forward the lives of people on this board - to a place where they have found peace with what happened in their lives. Some will be forwarded, and they will be bitter old people. Those at peace will quietly ponder these dates and those who remain bitter will live the hell over and over again.<P>Terri,Orchid, Resilient, after shock (nice name) ... not sounding at all bitter. Keep going, life will get better.

My 5 year wedding anniversary is this Friday, Sept. 14. Not sure what to think or what to do. All I know is that if and when my H does come home, we'll still be married 5 years even if we didn't celebrate it. I'm a little upset that its going to be 5 years because usually people do something special for 5, 10, 15 years. Not this year for me.