Four years ago my girlfriend's H decided he no longer wanted to be married...this sent her on what is now, for me, a familiar rollercoaster ride...I wish I had known then, what I know now...<P>He had, at the very least, an EA with a former girlfriend...they separated for about a year and a half. He returned to the home and neither one of them really did any 'changes'...I continued to hear the same complaints from her regarding her H.<P>Since June I tried to get her to read the Harleys' stuff...I explained plan A and B...I talked about Lovebusters, His Needs/Her Needs...<P>In August, she told me that he said he was moving out, again and wanted to continue divorce proceedings that had been started with the first separation...<P>As "luck?" would have it, the statute of limitations had one short month before the whole process would have had to be started again...so they QUICKLY got their paperwork back into the court system and it will be finalized in a week or two...<P>Today he called her and said that he now thought he had made a horrible mistake...was it too late to stop the D.<P>My girlfriend, who now feels relief from all the stress of is he or isn't he...does he or doesn't he...are we committed or not...told him..."See someone...get yourself together...figure out your head...then we'll talk..."<P>What is my point?<P>No matter how discouraged you are...no matter how far along in the process...the most important thing is that you are here...learning...that you are reading...that you are taking control of you...that you are finding your deep issues and dealing with them...<P>Make no hasty decisions about separation or divorce or even plan b...<P>God has a plan...trust...believe...<P>Cali<P>------------------<BR><I>Live Impeccably In Your Word.<BR>Don't Take Anything Personally.<BR>Make No Assumptions.<BR>Do Your Best Always. </I>

Cali,<P> How did you know I needed to hear that again tonight?<P> I'll say one thing. I get so much support from this site and you great people. Even when posters are not directly speaking to me. <P> Aren't we lucky?<P> This has given me strength for a few more hours. Now I can go get some sleep. Then get up and perhaps go a little longer than I did today. Then, as the ride cranks up again I'll come here again for more pick-me-ups.<P> Thanks girl.<P> jd

Sounds good. Sounds really good Cali, because I heard Dr.Phil say something very interesting on Monday. He said if it's right today, it will be right in two weeks. Another thing we always have to remember is that God is NEVER in a rush. God will never rush us around in a panic. His ways are ways of patience and peace and gentleness and wisdom. He knows our schedule. He's in control. Thanks for the reminder!

bumping up...