My WH called me tonight at about 8 p.m. and mentioned that he was waiting for me to call....well...I was waiting for him to call....lol<P>He was on his way into town to get his hair cut and told me that him and the OW got into a fight at work today.<BR>He said that when he got there she acted like she was mad at him and the only thing she would say was that she would tell him later....otherwise she sulked and didn't talk to him all day.....oh how sad huh?<BR>Well....one of WH's friends asked her why she was so mad....and get this....she said it was because my WH hadn't moved in with her yet. She tells him every day that he can move in with her...one day it's for free...he wouldn't have to pay a thing...and the next it's for a small amount.<P>My WH was already starting to see her for what she was....he asked her if she was coming out to see him last night at his house and she made an excuse like she always does. She didn't feel well enough to go out there and visit him...but she felt well enough to go shopping all evening. She said...before they got off the phone....I miss you....he said...no you don't...if you did you'd be out here with me. She didn't say a word to that.<P>OK....to the good stuff. According to my WH the fight ended with her walking off and him saying...whatever...you need to grow up.<BR>Since then....she's left 27 messages on his answering machine at home....and at least that many on his cell phone. He hasn't answered any of them and says he doesn't plan to....I heard him tell my sister that he was going to give her the phone after he got off of it with me and if she called....he wasn't there.<BR>He told me tonight that tomorrow he is going to tell her to hit the road.<P>This of course I will believe when I see that they no longer have anything to do with each other.<P>I told him that I didn't think he would call it off with her...that she will say something sweet to him tomorrow and they will be all over each other again. He said....I don't think so....I'm tired of her....and her always wanting things HER way.<P>I then said....that is good for you....I wish you well....too bad I will never get what I truly want...which he knows exactly what it is. He said....you don't think so huh? You never know....you may be surprised.<P>So....I'm not exactly sure where to go from here.<BR>Deep down I want my marriage to work....but I can't stand the thought of going through a mess like I have for the last 8 months again......EVER.<BR>I'm not sure at this point whether I want to move on....or stay where I'm at and see what happens with my WH and me.<BR>He admitted that he didn't want me to see anyone else.<P>I asked him tonight....I could have my pick of about 20 guys at this very moment.....so why do I keep picking you?<BR>He said......because you love me. I said I know that...and you know that.....but you can't say the same yourself. He said.....you don't think so? You may be surprised yet again.<P>So....I'm clueless again.

Miss Priss~<P>Here is my thought on this: <P>It seems the affair is dying a natural death. The way that your husband needs to end the affair. Most affairs end a natural death, but they take a long time to end this way and is very hard on the betrayed spouse. <P>I know you love your husband so very much still and the last week he has been able to make some deposit in your love bank. &#61514;<P>When he does end the affair and you decide to rebuild your marriage I would take it very slow. I know you already know this, and taking it slow can be hard to do. Your husband needs to prove several things to you. NO contact with the OW, and he needs to step up and work on the marriage with you. This time it needs to be done together. He will have withdrawal, even though he will end the affair. You need to continue to support him and listen without making judgmental remarks to him. Biting your tongue will be hard, even though you knew the affair would end. It will take time for both and a lot of patience of both sides. Both will go through many emotions and question if this is the right thing to do. <P>Try not to throw things in his face about the affair or the many men you can pick from. I believe in your heart it still belongs with him and no else will interest you. Protect yourself, because you are vulnerable to an affair, with needs not be meet . But please don’t expect him to work without you. Things will come out for the better as you work together. But it will take a lot of time. Even though you want it now that will never happen. I think both will test each other and test boundaries. But you need to keep your Plan “A” in force. You have become a better and stronger person.<P>It will very hard for him once he ends it with the OW. She will probably try to lure him back. If he ask for no contact she will continue to LB and disrespect him. You have become safe to him and you can continue to be this safe, to someone that he can talk to and enjoy your company.<P>I know you know all this, but I just wanted to refresh it in your mind.<P>Take care,<P>Judy<BR>