Out of curiousity, I feel like at times when I am plan Aing, I feel like am being taken advantage of my good nature. If your H goes off to see the OW, is part of the plan to say ok and just bite your tongue???? Confused? Can anyone shed some light as to the difference between Plan A and being a doormat??<BR>IP: Logged<BR>

Being a doormat would be you saying, "Okay dear, have a good time".<P>Being in plan A (ergo a better person) would be you saying, "I (am trying to) understand your need to go and wish you were ready to stay here with me. I love you".<P>See the difference? When in plan A, you are trying to avoid LB's, but you do NOT keep your feelings inside. That's only one aspect of it all.<P>Remember.. plan A is about YOU being a better person. For you to become the best wife no man would want to be without. Do not allow him any reason to rationalize his behaviour (by being a doormat, he'll realize he doesn't want a wife who has no spine... by LBing all over the place, he'll realize he doesn't want a wife who's 'nagging' him all the time). He is going to do whatever it is he wants to do right now. There's nothing you can do to change that. You can however, keep yourself from being the cause (in his mind) of that behaviour.<P>I hope this helps. <P>Karen<BR>