Faith,<p> I don't know. I just worry if she is ok and/or thinking about me and the kids. She didn't call back because she had to go to work. I know that she is there because I drove by there after work. Yes it does kill you. Not knowing what was going on. What her intentions were. She left a message to the kids this afternoon. She didn't even address me. So, if she didn't need to say anything to me then what on this earth could she have wanted?<p>Orchid,<p> Thanks for the support. I really need it.<p>Indy

Z,<p> How is STL and the kids? I have been thinking about your last post. Why do you think that our relationship is far from over? Also, were did the 98% return rate come from? I have also noted that your post have come really late in the evening. Is everthing alright?<p>Indy

Indy,<p>STL and the kids are doing fine. STL has been very busy. Just got back from Chicago a couple of hours ago. Then next weekend he and I are going to Orlando for the week. He's attending a seminar so I'm going along. Sorta a work/vacation. Unfortuantely his travel schedule is pretty grueling for the rest of the year.<p>The kids are doing ok. We are working to get some sense of stability and peace for them. It's a slow process and takes a lot of love and attention. They are good kids.. just need a firm hand and losts of love.<p>So that brings it to me. I tend to post late because that's when I finally get some time to myself. After a day at work and then taking care of the kids. There is little time left for myself. I tend to read MB before bed. I have also been suffering from insominia since d-day. So there have been many nights that I have been on the computer until the wee hours because I just cannot sleep. It all caught up with me physically in the last few weeks. Have been having one stupid invection after another. I had a root canal on Monday and by that night I was running a fever. So was home sick yesterday. Part of this is something I've been struggling with for a few weeks. The doc took some cultures yesterday so by Friday they should know which Antibiotic I should be on to finally get rid of it.<p>I think I might have not gotten this sick if STL's affairs were all I had to deal with since March. But having to deal with the problems with the kids and the ex-wife issues... I admit, I've hit the wall. I am not super woman.<p>STL tends to handle things by going to his cave (his home office) and hybernating. I think that's why he has not been on MB for a while. There is only so much a person can deal with at any one time.<p>You are right in your picking up that I'm a little stressed/under the weather right now.<p>I think that the lesson here is that emotional stress can make a person's defenses fall apart. So take very good care of yourself through all of this.<p>So here it is late again and I'm on the computer. But I'm calling it a night. STL is home finally and I will not let the isomnia win tonight. <p>By the way, the reason I said that your relationship with you wife is far from over is that she is still trying to contact you. She has not closed the door. It seems that she is reaching out but does not know why.<p>Also, the 98% comes from several articles I've read about affairs.<p>You take care.

Everyone,<p> I am really down today. I really miss my family, but knowing that familyis gone forever. I will never be the same again. I just know that she is happy now that she is rid of me and the kids. I don't know how, but she is. I am now thinking about just getting it over with. She doesn't want to be a family with me any longer. So, why prolong the enevitable? She has made her choice. She only calls to talk to or about the kids. Like I said before. I could fall off the face of the earth and she wouldn't notice. What makes people change like that?<p>Indy<p>Z,<p> You sound so tired. I can't stand the fact that I am adding to your already heavy load. Have a nice time with STL. I hope it goes well. Besides, this post is really getting long. I think that it is time to reitre this one.<p>[ November 01, 2001: Message edited by: INDY_357 ]<p>[ November 01, 2001: Message edited by: INDY_357 ]</p>

wuzzup Indy?
you ready to get the D done with? Is that what you mean?
You have e-mail. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Faith1

Faith,<p> I sent you an email.<p>Indy

Indy,<p>Something strange happened here today. I wrote you a post but guess it did not take. Just got home from work and am winding down by reading up here on MB.<p>I come here to MB because I get a lot out of it. So never feel like you are a burden.<p>Z

Faith and Z,<p> She left a message at my parents' house About getting the things that were in the house that were in the PL agreement. I think that is all that she wanted the other day. As far as her still trying to reach out to me. I don't think that she is. I think she dreads calling or seeing me. She is having to much fun with the OM. I lost this battle before she even left our home. I know that know. I am thinking about leaving the kids with my parents. They are better people than I could ever hope to be. This will allow me to disappear. I still think that is the best course. I can't handle seeing her know that she is going to be with OM. <p>Indy<p>[ November 02, 2001: Message edited by: INDY_357 ]</p>

Now Indy,<p>YOur parents did no make those kids and they should not have the responsibility of raising them.<p>If you are going to leave them, why are you now talking about leaving them with your parents instead of your wife?<p>Z

INDY_357,
Sorry to jump in ... I has been following this thread all along. Why don't you do something fun for tonite ?. We used to go as family to let the one of us choose any restaurant they want to go then we do it on Friday. Tonite is my turn to select and my W is planning to stray out w/ OM ... I learn to have fun w/ my 2 D. I will bring them to have dinner & probably ice cream at the conner shop.
Lucky for my 2 D, they are in competetive roller skating, they are busy w/ training. I join them now in the adult division. Do something with your kid, the one that they love to do.<p>Any sport that your kid like ?.

Z,<p> My parents talked to me a couple of weeks ago when we talked about this. The day that I almost did it they begged me to reconsider or that they would raise them. I didn't and I proceeded to leave for their house. At that time they told me that they didn't want to have anything to do with me. The rest you know. The reason why I am thinking of leaving them with my parents' is beacuse I don't know if my WS wants them or not. Besides this will give everyone some closure to this situation. The rest of my family is ok with what is going on. They can deal with my WS. I can't even talk to her. It would be much easier if this happened. <p>Redhat,<p> I have tried to do things like that. I always start looking around to see were my SD and WS are. I can't be half a family man. I can't have half a family. I want my family or none at all.<p>Indy

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by INDY_357:
<strong>Redhat,<p> I have tried to do things like that. I always start looking around to see were my SD and WS are. I can't be half a family man. I can't have half a family. I want my family or none at all.<p>Indy</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Indy, IMHO ... you should stop your obsession about WS/OM. Your kid need you ... I have to take charge for my 2 beautiful & talented D. I have additional job ... "roller skater mom". They are my strength to go through this storm.<p>No, you are not half a family man ... you are THE FAMILY MAN for now until WS comes out from the fog. Once in a while, my D slipped and called me MOM !!!. I never imagine how close my relation w/ my 2 D has became.<p>Got to go to pick my D and have dinner ... I will check in again tonight ... [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

Redhat,<p> My daughter does the same thing. I will post in a little while. I need to get the kids home and in bed.<p>Indy

Everyone,<p> Just wanted to tell you that I was back.<p>Indy

Hey Indy, <p>I have a great name for you. When STL was alone with his kids, they called him "Mr. Mom".<p>He loved it. <p>
Z [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Z,<p> My dad just came in and delivered a message to me. My WS called again and said that she wants the stuff that was in or agreement and that she has a court order for it. She also said that I needed to call her. I think that it should be done through my lawyer's office. Do you think that I should call her or not? I know that she is going to be real cruel to me. What do you think?<p>Indy

Hi Indy, <p>This is not Z but me and my 2 cents...... IMHO, your W is trying to anger you. Don't give her that pleasure. You could do one of the following: <p>1. nothing.
2. acknowledge you received the message but do
not say what you will do.
3. spill your guts and get stomped on.
4. do everything she wants her way regardless of
the impact on you and your family.
5. reply in anger and fuel her fog.
6. hold off sending a reply until Monday and
send a reply via your lawyer
7. send a reply via her family<p>There may be more ideas. It's kinda getting late and I am still at work. Don't let her push your buttons. OK? <p>L.

Orchid,<p> I try not to let it anger me. It hurt more than anything. What would you do in this situation?<p>Indy

Sorry double post.<p>Indy<p>[ November 02, 2001: Message edited by: INDY_357 ]</p>

Z,<p> Where did you go?<p>Indy