As some here may know, about a month ago I had decided to throw in the towel for the second time in 14 months. I was SO[B]sure of my decision. It must have been at that same time that he truly decided to save his marriage and keep his family together. He was more withdrawn and quet than usual, and not at ALL confrontational, which is rare for him. He's been SAYING since dday#1 that he wants his marriage and to come home. He hadn't done anything about it until recently. <P>Something in him has changed and I don't know what it is or how it happened. It's not the "fog" lifting -- or maybe it's its own special fog. His OW were all one-night-stands, women he says he wouldn't recognize or ever care to if he saw them in the street.<P>I think that the progression of events had a lot to do with my own meltdown last week. I decided mid-September that there was no more hope of reconcilliation and I had resigned myself to that fact. Wanted to tell him with MC present. Didn't work out that way. I started that slow, downhill plunge on the roller coaster and he started reacting in a way he never had before. He was not loving and supportive from the start, but he stuck around. He did not follow me down the coaster. He stayed in control and tried to be as solid as he could. With that, he kept apologizing, for everything. Everything from day 1 that has gone wrong. When I reached the bottom and exploded, he went into full support mode. Not a nasty word, glare or snicker, no judgement or frustration. I said some really, really horrible things -- things I had never said before. He said nothing in retaliation. Just "I love you" and "I'm sorry for all of this, this is all my fault, you don't deserve this".<P>Instead of swaying and lingering there at the bottom for days on end, the coaster went back up. It only took a few days. And last night, while we were having a quick quiet supper out, away from the kids, he said something that may have sealed this recovery for good. One of our biggest blocks has been communication, with me feeling that I was never heard, my words falling on uncaring ears. " I'm sorry you had to spend all of those years screaming and crying to get me to hear you. I wasn't listening. I want you to know that from now on, I will work hard to hear you even when you whisper. "<P>in renewed hope, <BR>Snow
