Hello to all. Things here have been going fairly well. the biggest issue between WH and myself is that I feel he feels since everything about his A is out in the open it is now time to put it behind us and move on to repair our marriage. The rollercoaster ride is not so bad now as it was at DDay 4 weeks ago. But the ups and downs are stil there. I can not help but have these questions pop up in my head every now and then. I am not sure if it is best to talk to him when I get these thoughts or just push them to the back of my mind.<BR>Anyways as my subject line states, when do you know that you are ready to forgive the WS? Being a Spirit filled Christian I know that I need to forgive him, and I so much want to forgive him...but on the other hand I know that when I offer my forgivness to him that it is a done deal and the A is truly in the past. Does this make any sense to anyone out there? [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img] Any input will be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance. <BR>PS, I am glad I found this site when I did. The articles are great and all the help and genuine feelings of comfort I get here are a great bleesing to me.<BR>MAT

One thing to remember: Forgiving your H is really more for YOU than for HIM. If you have questions, try to approach your H with them. I know that when I first thought my H's A was over, I forgave. Unfortunately, he was still lying, so now forgiveness is harder for me. I am still not sure of his truthfulness. I think that in order to recover, if you are uncomfortable and still have questions, you need them answered. God does ask us to forgive, but he knows we are human and it doesn't come as easily to us as it does for him. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] Search your heart; pray about it. Ask the questions. If your H gets angry, explain that you are trying to work through and come to a place of forgiveness. God wants your marriage healed, but he knows that you can't do it alone!! Prayers and blessings to you!<P>MOM

numbnohio:<P>I ask myself the same question. But it is hard to forgive when you are not sure if they are still lying. and it is no easy to forgive if you have been deeply hurt. <P>Jesus forgave all of us for our sins. He died for us. But as myownme pointed out Jesus is God and we don't have the same abilities to forgive so easily. <P>I am going to try and learn from this. There is a reason God gave me this cross to bear. I must find that reason and learn from it and maybe then I can forgive.<P>Jenni70