<p>[ January 20, 2002: Message edited by: Bunny ]</p>

tobe<P>It is me again. Sometimes you think it is lifting and then it sets back in. I talked with my WH on phone a little while ago and for a year now he has told me he is leaving b/c he doesn't love me. Now he tells me he wants the feeling to come back and he hopes they do. <P>When I can tell my WH is talking in thick fog I say to myself "he is talking out his [censored] again" b/c I really think they do not know what they are saying. Things will get better. Stay in Plan A. No LB. I have learned here that we can not stop them. Just let them fall flat on their face.<P>hug to you<P>(((((((((((tobemomoffour))))))))))))))))

2bMomof4---<P>Wow...you have a lot on your plate...we have a lot in common...I too have boys of similar age (8, 5 1/2, 2 1/2)...<P>Can fog lift? I have read recovery stories where it happens...in my case I think my H has been fogged in ever since we got married and now wants to blame the whole thing on me...<P>I have had my ups and downs...right now I am in a real downer...<P>There's many good people here who will give you sage advice...glad you're reading and posting...if nothing else you will become a success story because you get stronger...and I guess that is NOT nothing, eh? stronger is a good place.<P>Cali

<p>[ January 20, 2002: Message edited by: Bunny ]</p>

Hi there,<P> I am so sorry that you are going through this while pregnant especially.. <P>My situation was almost exactly like yours down to the 4 kids and Dr. husband.My H like yours was "madly in love with the OW" and made a huge mistake in marrying me.<P>Dday was almost 3 years ago and we are together and happy. Listen to Steve , he will guide you .....he helped me keep my sanityand I credit MB with saving my marriage.( I went to plan B at one point). As hard as it is, refrain from LBing . Your H by saying things about the financial parts of D and agreeing to talk to Steve is showing some confusion.....that's good. Hang in there.....LU

Tobe,<P>I'm so sorry this is happening to you, especially at this time when you need all the love and support to get through your pregnancy. It is early yet, give your H time for the fog to burn off. I do think he is coming around since he has agreed to talk to Steve. Keep up a good Plan A, you won't regret it!

I'm not prepared to offer much MB advice right now, but I do want you to know that I am someone who understands what you're going through all too well.<P>I was 7 months pregnant with twin boys when my H decided that he wanted out of our marriage. I found out about his EA (which turned PA within a month) at that time, and kicked him out within 2 weeks. It was with a now former friend of mine for over 2 yrs. <P>It wasn't until after the boys were born (on Feb 17th, 2001) that I learned about and found this site. I am so thankful for this place. (They weren't due until mid March, but b/c of my blood pressure rising so much, I was admitted to hospital on bed rest, and ended up having an emergency c-section.)<P>Speaking from experience, your pregnancy hormones are not going to help you through this time. I feel for you, b/c I know what I went through, and it was that much harder due to my physical condition.<P>I guess I do have some advice for you. (I wish I had learned this earlier). Keep on posting your frustrations on here. You need to vent; to yell and scream at your H? Do it on here (or in a journal). Don't do it to him, until you know how to address your feelings in a non LBing way.<P>And just to let you know.. H and I were separated for 4 months, and have been in recovery for 5 months now. There is hope for your marriage too. Your best chances of recovery lie in sticking to the MB principles and concepts. They really can work.<P>Karen