Is this good or bad. My WH told me today that the OW dumped him for OM. He really is hurting and I am glad she dumped him, but wow I hate to see him hurt. Any Advise to this. Thanks

Interesting turn of events, still,<P>Plan A him, let him talk if he wants to (Really hard, huh?), avoid disrespectful judgments against OW because he may feel compelled to defend her, acknowledge his pain, and keep your fingers crossed. OW may waffle between your H and new OM, so it may not be over yet.<P>Hoping for you, Estes

49<P> Thanks that is what I did today and I feel so good about myself. He told me about a week ago that he could not talk to me about her. But today he let loose. He found out last week from a coworker and has called her twice today and blessed her out ( I love it)<BR>I know we have along way to go but I feel now maybe there is some hope. He still thinks he is the only one that has ever gone through this and what is funny in the book SAA the names are the same ( Sue and Greg) hits home>

bump<P>I need some more post on this one.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by still love him:
<strong>bump<p>I need some more post on this one.</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Dear SLH,
Estes gave you excellent advice! Go with Plan A and it is very important not to make any disrespectful statements towards your H, the A or OW. I myself am learning alot about this as it is a major problem with me, so I speak from experience. I get upset & can't understand how someone can hurt you when you Love & Care for them so much so the anger takes over when I don't see any remorse or they try to justify it and I make disrespectful remarks. This is very damaging and will definetly end any chance of rebuilding your relationship. But I feel it is important for your H at some time to show remorse for what he did and show you that he cares about you and how you were hurt by his actions. I'm am now learning, that comes later in Plan A after things are working and getting better.<p>Your feelings and how you were hurt by this betrayal are important too. If I was working things out and the person tried to justify their actions or didn't think it was wrong I would then watch to see if they are lacking morals or character because you don't want someone like that either because it's just going to be a matter of time until you get hurt again.<p>Betrayal is one of the worst pain we can ever experience even worse then someone close to us becoming deceased. You can mourne the death of someone, they are gone, you can realize they can't come back and are not with us anymore but with betrayal the person is still there and the pain will be much longer.<p>I suggest reading about Plan A, Love Busters & Disrespectful Judgements. I've been reading sooooooooo much about these areas and analyzing peoples posts and problems pertaining to this. I feel it is one of the most important parts of anyone working things out and sometimes when you go through something like this it can make your relationship better then it was before.
Good Luck SLH [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] tom<p>[ October 24, 2001: Message edited by: Tomstocks ]</p>