I still vote yes. <p>It does not matter how much he is threatened by OW and how much she keeps tabs on him. If he wants to cheat he will. Outside influences do not seem to work for this guy.<p>The only way I'd change my response is if the changes were within him. <p>There are of course people who cheat for years on everyone. Then one day something hits them on the head, the light bulb goes on and they see the light. Short of that, people tend to behave in patterns.<p>Z

Definitely, a yes he will....know from experience [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Daughter says "NO WAAAAAY" [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

ummmm.... hehe [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>All I can think of during this whole thread is:<p>How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light-bulb?<p>1, but the light-bulb has to WANT to change.<p>I mean, seriously.... we all know people can change. They do it every day. Recover from all kinds of stuff, and never repeat. But based on your description so far of this person, they haven't done anything to "change".<p>So I have to vote YES, he will probably cheat again.

It doesn`t matter what restrictions the new OW puts on him, where there`s a will there`s a way and it definitely sounds like there is a will here.<p>This is a no brainer, of course he`s going to do it again.<p>[ November 05, 2001: Message edited by: Daisy37 ]</p>

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Resilient:
<strong>Okay....
My question is this: Do you think the H will cheat on this new OW?<p>[ November 02, 2001: Message edited by: Resilient ]</strong><hr></blockquote><p>
I don't beleive in "Once a cheater" but twice a cheater is another story. 3 times a cheater is a definite pattern. I say yes.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Resilient:
<strong>
But here's some more Poll info. Lets see if this will change your mind.<p> ... what if they have a child together???<p>Will he cheat on new OW still? Hmmmmmm???<p>Jo<p>[ November 03, 2001: Message edited by: Resilient ]</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Sure why not. All of those things might discorage him for awhile, but eventually he'll get bored and they won't seem so threatening. Plus he convince himself that he won't get caught anyway, so all of the threats will be irrelevant to him.

OK.....I'm gonna say NO. Somebody here's gotta be hopeful!<p>I don't get this. Alot of you have been involved with people who fit this profile -- and yet you're all still hopeful that your marriages will work, and willing to work on them. <p>So would you all leave your marriages if you thought the propensity to cheat was in your spouse?

Hey Lexxxy,<p>I respectfully disagree with regard to this scenario emulating most MBer's stories.<p>This WS has demonstrated a clear "pattern" of repetitive infidelity and never with the same OP. He cheated on his first "soul mate", who he left his wife for and who he touted to be "in-love" with. Somewhat rare, wouldn't you say? IMVHO, he is the exception, not the rule.<p>I don't want to influence anyone's vote, but I just had to offer my 2 cents.<p>Jo<p>[ November 05, 2001: Message edited by: Resilient ]</p>

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Lexxxy:
<strong>OK.....I'm gonna say NO. Somebody here's gotta be hopeful!<p>I don't get this. Alot of you have been involved with people who fit this profile -- and yet you're all still hopeful that your marriages will work, and willing to work on them. <p>So would you all leave your marriages if you thought the propensity to cheat was in your spouse?</strong><hr></blockquote><p>A lot of us have spouses who only had one affair. I know for me I coudl forgive one. No second chances. Once doesn't make a pattern. 2 times is getting questionable. 3 strikes....

I'd just like to say one more thing:<p>My ex-H cheated five times. He said he'd learned.
This same man said to me, about two months ago, that he wasn't going to tell the new woman in his life (who he said was the first person he felt "in love with" since me) that he was going on a week-long, cross-country, vacation with the OW (the church lady he was with at the end of our marriage) because he'd learned that being honest only causes problems.<p>Guess what? They don't necessarily learn, and if they do learn something, no telling what it might be.<p>(Oh, and by the way, by the end of his trip, church lady kicked him on the driveway and hasn't been with him since -- seems he led her to believe they'd stop in Vegas and marry -- ooops. <p>And, the new woman?? Dropped him like a hot potato about two weeks later. Wonder why? I don't think *I'll* ever know the truth, and it's none of my biz... but... one wonders.)

My vote,,Yes, he will. But probably not for long without getting caught. The only major difference between this relationship and any of his past relationships is that this OW is onto him. She KNOWS what he is capable of and hasn't gone into this with "blind trust". It will happen again UNLESS he has done some serious self-evaluations and made personal changes.

Ok Resilient... it's been a couple of days now. It's time to share with us WHY you are asking this 'hypothetical question'? [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Karen

Okay MBer's,<p>I'll offer some more scraps of info regarding this WS.<p>He is not living with the OW, because it's cost prohibiting. Hmmm..... However, they toggle back and forth from his place to hers. <p>This WS has been reported to say that he's opposed to marrying OW. His reasons are ambiguous.<p>Jo

Geez, he's doing it! <p>That certainly sounds like fog talk.<p>Have you been toying with us?<p>I bet in some strange way this might make you feel better. You saved yourself this extra twist of the knife.<p>I'm sorry he's taking you back through this all again. <p>Jeffers

Surely all the readings suggest that it takes two to make a relationship work and to be sure he will cheat is selling the new wife short. Maybe she will be able to satisfy the EN and PN's of the guy and keep him faithful.

That was always a threat [albeit unspoken] in his previous marriage and it didn't stop him then. He already lost another marriage from his adultery, I don't see why this one would be any different. Especially when he happens onto his next "soulmate."

Most likely.....I sure wouldnt bet against it.
Some people make mistakes, and affairs occur. Other situations are not quite that clear cut. How many other affairs has this man had that we dont know about? What kind of counseling has he gone thru?
Can anyone possibly meet this mans needs?
Hmmmm, I vote with he will continue to cheat, given what has been shared!<p>[ November 05, 2001: Message edited by: cl ]</p>

Welcome Ausinfidel,<p>I'll give you a bit more background on this WS. It'll offer you a glimpse into a small window of his character, or lack thereof.<p>When the XW first met this man he was sleeping with his best friend's live-in GF.<p>The wife was a fool not to pay attention to the fact that this man demonstrated such a lack of loyalty, honor and morals, she should have ran for her very life, but sadly didn't.<p>So Ausinfidel, do you really think any woman can meet this WS needs, now knowing a bit more? <p>Jo

Jo,<p>Maybe his first sexual experience was at 13 at the hands of three women who sought to "Teach" him about sex and how to satisfy women... Note the plural.<p>Then maybe his next wife is able to identify this life changing abuse and his Need to satisfy or be with more than one woman at a time could be addressed?

Perhaps, Ausinfidel. What kind of marriage would that be? Sounds more like an orgy to me. <p>Point of order: WS has said he doesn't see himself marrying OW.