CL.. Et Al,
Okay... someone tell me what happens when you get near or to the acceptance stage? I didn't realize that I was encroaching on that shore, CL, until you mentioned it. But that is what I'm feeling.<p>I had a pretty rough weekend. SOS (same ole ****) I've been pretty angry for the last week, becoming bitter somewhat. Still trying to be her safe harbour when I can. Alot of solitude this weekend.<p>Restraining Order is coming, its presence will rock the boat. W and I had SF Friday night...she initiated by asking me if I would. Next morning she wanted to be honest and W told me that her and OM have been having sex, but its been awhile..., at the neighbors house, 2 F'ing doors down, while I was here at the house, on her lunch hour...supposedly. OM wanted time with her this weekend.. and tossed rocks on the roof of the house..half of the night Saturday night. Denied throwing more than one...She never woke up..., but I didn't sleep. I retrieved 12 rocks from the roof and yard, skirting the house, all the same kind of rock not indigineous to our yard or landscaping. I showed her the rocks. She wasn't amused. W invited OM to Thanksgiving Dinner, when W assumes that I am going to see my mother when my mother comes to visit a friend in the Dallas area. She didn't ask me when I was going to see my mother... but it was going to be the day after Thanksgiving, due to my mothers plans for shopping.<p>W told me she wasn't going to OM's christmas party and that she was going to her's alone. Should I sit here at home and babysit?<p>DNA test was performed on Monday of last week by OM and baby. Without my approval or knowledge. I told W I don't want to or need to know who's the father. I already am named on the birth certificate. <p>Has anyone ever heard of filing a Restraining Order against the DNA clinic from releasing the information? RO on the OM is coming, but needed to know if I should have also included the clinic.?<p>W doesn't want me to leave, run or plan B for that matter. She doesn't understand what she is doing to me on a daily basis. Of course, I'm sure I make her world hell, also.<p>Alot on my plate this week, and it isn't turkey.<p>(post correlates with long one... All or nothing)

bump

It's been close to 3 years and your wife is still doing the back and forth dance, why, because she can. I think Plan B is LONG OVERDUE! JMO<p>[ November 19, 2001: Message edited by: trying2_4give ]</p>

T24G,<p>I appreciate you opinion...always. I agree that three years is a very long time for anyone to endure an A, especially the special circumstances that I alone have had to deal with seperately in many cases. There were times when moving to Plan B would have been dangerous for her on some accounts and I even as caloused as I might be at times, could not accept the responsibility of letting her go...to an abusive man, because that is where she would have run, had I initiated Plan B. I am a very strong person and have endured so much more than a lot of people here, but my efforts at Plan A at times were futile. Part of my growth was to get away from blame, manipulation and the excuses I made for me. It took me a long time to get past that part of myself. Now that I have made a better me...I have Plan A'ed correctly now and she see's it, but the timeline has taken its toll on all of us involved. Had I Plan A'ed correctly in the beginning and truley changed my behaviors and my actions, this may have been over a very long time ago. But that is the process of living learning and healing that I have had to GROW through. <p>Your right 3 years is a long time, but this time, I have followed the Plan correctly, and I am a better me.