Hello all, thanks for the recent posts on MrsWLD's thread and my "letter" from WS thread. <p>Jill, here are links to the "letter" from you, and a separate one for a response from MrsWLD:<p>JC's Letter<p>MrsWLD's post<p>It's been several days since I've posted anything, I'll try to bring you all up to speed (quickly, if that's possible for me).<p>FIL came up last weekend to deliver some craft supplies to WS, and to talk to her about this whole mess. SO, I was given a chance to see her that I otherwise wouldn't have had. What'd I do with that chance? Acted cranky and freaked her out by staring at her over lunch....good move K.<p>Anyway, she and her dad exchanged letters about this all. I haven't read either of them. <p>WS had her first session w/ Steve on Tues, and she came over tonight to talk about it. She agrees with the EN principles just doesn't want ME to meet them. She also doesn't trust that I can change the patterns that caused her to fall out of love with me. I understand her apprehension. I feel aweful for the hurt that I've caused her for the last four years. I wish there were SOMETHING I could do to remove that pain, but I can't. I think that someday, she'll fogive me, but she'll never forget. I don't think that's a bad thing, but I would hope we could take those lessons and build upon them for a brighter future.<p>I know she's frustrated, that she hurts, that she just wants to get on with life.....I am all those things too, just that I want to get on with life TOGETHER, building from HERE, rather than starting over at 0.<p>I don't know. I asked her to PLEASE try to believe that I'll NEVER hurt her like I have over the last several years again. It just might not be enough.<p>Thanks for your continued support, prayers, and guidance.<p>Kev<p>[ December 05, 2001: Message edited by: kevco- ]<p>[ December 07, 2001: Message edited by: kevco- ]</p>

BUMP
(I am finally done) [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Kev,
Thanks for the update!
It sounds like you are coping well, all things considered.
I think it is a very positive sign that you S had session with Steve!
A lot of people have told me to focus more on me. I was given this advice, but it never really clicked until I got involved in this 12 step support group I sometimes mention. The focus of this group is for spouses, or family members of a person who has an unhealthy attitude or has acted out in an unhealthy way, sexually. The exact extent of this condition can be debated & there are certainly a lot of negative connotation that could be assigned to this condition, but the support group can be very helpful to a person in their recovery process. It can be very helpful to us, BS&#8217;s in how we are coping with the behavioral, acting that out our S has exhibited.
To register online & receive or be involved with this does not require any disclosure of the facts of your situation & it is autonomous, so you don&#8217;t have anything to lose if you want to check it out. You may want to learn more about what is all about before you actually register, & even if you don&#8217;t register, which would give you automatic updates via email, or interact with others, you can visit the sight & observe the posts &#8211; most of these are very motivational or inspirational & offer reinforcement to us (BS) that we are still very worthwhile people!<p>This whole topic is quite involved & too complicated for me to adequately explain at this time, but if you care to check it out, you will get the gist.
The web site:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Progress-Meeting/<p>Perhaps it will help.
Best Of luck!
HH

Hey Kev,
Just wanted you to know I'm still here praying for you buddy!! I hope you have a peaceful weekend!! Take care,
MOM [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Mrs W-
Thank you SO much for your story. I'm sure it was hard, and I'm sorry it dredged up some not so fond memories. I hope WS reads it. I'm VERY grateful for your help and support.<p>HH-
I'll check out the thread. At this point, I don't think that that factors it, but I really know nothing about it, so it could very well. I'll look, thanks.<p>MOM!!
Thanks for the weekend wishes! Right back atcha! I've been pretty quiet on the forums for the last week or so...lot going on at home, and quite a bit of interaction w/ WS. I feel pretty good about where we're at right now ('course I ALWAYS want more, but what I have is better than the alternative). Also, I've been IM'ing with several people lately....feel a little more "secure" in those conversations. Though I wouldn't say anything here that I wouldn't in front of WS, just don't want anything misunderstood.<p>I have hockey tix this weekend, so it'll be fun.<p>Later,
Kev

bump for Jill.