My WS is seeing a shrink (it's shorter than phy..please don't be offended) because I had left country and she had a mental breakdown and depression and anxiety kicked in really bad. She had been on an antidepressant for about a year, by suggestion of her family practitioner. Well, she went to see this shrink to get help for that and the shrink determined that she had a problem with anxiety attacts. My WS won't talk to me much about what she and her shrink talk about, but what she does tell me is that she feels really comfortable with her. She has told me that her shrink has told her that she has alot of stress in her life and needs to figure out what that stress is and get rid of it. Well, I'm the stress, according to my WS. So she sees that she needs to get away from me. She's only seen this shrink 3 times so far and has another appointment soon. About every three weeks. I think that she has told her shrink about the D, but she has yet to have a chance to talk to her about...she's already moved out, she's living with the OM, who was my BF, and who says that he loves her too. What I'm concerned about is that this shrink may be suggesting to her to leave. I don't know if that's the case or not. But I did ask my WS if I could go with her to a session so I could help the shrink with whatever problems that my WS might have. She talked to the shrink about it and the shrink didn't think it was a good idea because it might be a conflict of interest. That doesn't make sense. If she wants to help my WS, then why wouldn't she want to know more about what's going on. To get to the ROOT of the problem. Isn't that what they're there for? When my WS told me this, I said I understood and that it was OK. I'm worried that her shrink may be telling her to leave. Could I be right? She values her shrinks opinion alot and will probably do as she says. I worry because someone told me a story about a lady that went to a shrink years ago and they told her to leave her husband and then later the lady wished she had never left her spouse. She listened to her shrink and the shrink was wrong. I know there's not anything I can do about what her shrink tells her, I'm just looking for some opinions.

Hi, <p>Schedule an appointment with Steve or Jennifer ASAP. Sounds like the 'shrink' is not in favor of the marriage but you don't know what the 'shrink' is being told about your M either. So to judge her right now maybe with the wrong data. <p>Best bet is to see Steve or Jennifer. They offer the phone counseling service. good stuff.<p>Wishing you well.
L.

Hi I am new here and cannot say alot, I am in the process of rebuilding my marriage and there is alot going on. I am really in no place to tell anyone what to do but I do want to say this to you. I come here for support and it's a great place. There are some really good people here. They don't judge you, they just give you their thoughts and support. No one has had a chance to write to you yet but give it a day or so, they will. There are some real angels here. So don't feel alone. Just try to hang in there and you will get a world of knowledge here. Post your same note in Emotional Needs. Seems to be the place most looked at from what I can see. I promise you will get support here and they will give you tools you need to get through this. I wish I could say more but as I said...being honest here..I have alot I am working on but I want you to know, you are not alone. This is a great place. It's helped me very much. I don't feel so alone anymore.
Hang in there
**T**
RN
Married 8 years on March 1, 2002
Husband and I are working things through
No kids/Just a big fat cat :-)
Turn the BIG 30 in Jan

Opps..see someone got to you same time I did...Told ya..its a great place..one last note. I see a counselor too for another issue. She never tells me what to do or not to do...She just gives me tools and I use those to sort through. Your wife's counselor does not sound right. Use this site to help your situation. You will be glad you did..Good luck and Good Night :-) [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img]

Your wifes shrink sounds to be a problem... ask her to be in couples counseling also as a place to work on marriage... would she think about that?<p>I am sorry to hear about your BF? and his mistakes... <p>HONEY

I have asked her to go to counseling with me and she won't. When we've had problems before, and almost D before she wouldn't go then either. She has been to family counseling with her mother several times in her mothers M's. This was when she was a teenager and she says she doesn't like the way counselor's work and basically had bad experiences with them. So she won't go to counseling with me. Thanks for the comments.