To my knowledge she is still with OM, I havn't asked, she hasn't said anything. <p>She called @ 9:30AM and asked me a legal question and then to lunch today. It was awkward for both of us and we verbalized it so. I LedB once not intentionally and she advised me of it and was gonna leave, I told her I didn't realize waht I said, she told me, I agreed with her, apologozed and we moved on, we both acknowledged that we handeled that well. <p>We discussed me meeting her needs and we are going to try and make plans for recreational activity this weekend. We are meeting tomorrow at the mall to shop and have dinner with the kids. <p>Her other important need is for sexuality which cannot be met by me at this time, but i told her in time we can get there. Hmmm, I wonder how she is getting that need met? Dare I ask?<p>She asked what we do about new friends, specifically ones the have been introduced by OM. I didn't have an answer, told her that but suggested time will be tight, most likely we wont have time for them. Anyone in counseling with Harleys have an answer?<p>She was reluctant to give me a hug goodby but did and stayed in my arms for a good 20-30 seconds whic is a long time, she was late going back to work. <p>All good stuff.<p>Said she would drop D if I gave her a support agreement. I signed it and faxed it to her this afternoon.<p>[ January 02, 2002: Message edited by: dadoftheyear ]</p>

Back to the top w/ a new title.<p>[ January 02, 2002: Message edited by: dadoftheyear ]</p>

Keep trying!
I wish that my H was confused....if he is he hasn't shown it. He wants the OW and that's it. She is going to move here and he says he has NO DOUBTS! I have not a clue what to do anymore. We are in the process of getting a D. I don't want to and I have told him---he says he doesn't love me and that is it. This is after 20 yrs of marriage and together for 22! I would still after all of this time take him back even after some crummy things happened.
You keep hanging in there...but do you have any ideas fo me? Oh yeah--he left in Aug.

FSA, <p>but do you have any ideas fo me? You are still realitivel early in the game. Get anti-depressants, read all the MB you can and paln A your butt off. A session with the Harley's too. POST POST POST. His A will end, the all do!!!

Hi, <p>I am concerned that she is making you feel better for a setup. Not to rain on your parade but I was feeling good until I read your last sentence of your 1st post. <p>"Said she would drop D if I gave her a support agreement. I signed it and faxed it to her this afternoon."<p>Hm...... what exposure does this agreement put you in? The answer is not for us, just for you to think about. You can share if you want but really really? The true answer to that belongs to you. <p>Just thinkin....<p>Take Care,
L.

Orchid, Very insightful.<p>Yes I have thought that she may be steeing my up, but not legally. My attroney drafted document, she fired hers, and has no representation. So if she does not have this agreement signed, existing court orders for support would be null and void if she drops the D. So she will drop the D if I execute a support agreement. <p>I incidentally, just got off the phone with her, negotiating agreement, and it went pretty well, we should wrap it up this evening.

Good, Cautious as serpents....innocent as doves. <p>I am glad to read your response. You are being careful and that is good. Not that your W would want to harm your future but in the fog, they can make some bad decisions at the family's expense. This is not meant to be mean just part of that awful truth. <p>I am glad the negogiations went well. <p>Take Care,
L.

A step backwards tonight, and it hurts. <p>WS says That she just doesn&#8217;t have the &#8220;spark&#8221; for me, Any suggestions on how she gets that &#8220;spark&#8221; back. Does this happen when I make enough Love Deposits or wehat? I suggested she post here and ask, we'll see. <p>Also informed she is reading MB books with OM and says he gets it. ( His ex wife had an affair). She told me she told him, she couldn&#8217;t imagine getting back together with me. She just doesn&#8217;t feel that way towards me now.

You are right. Never give up. The A has not died yet. It is likely to take some time for her feelings to be rekindled even after OM is history. I've read stories here that it could be months. Patience, plan A as you have been. You are doing a fine job. BTW, carefully follow up on the dropping of the D. My WDIL told my son she would do that. Never did and it has been hanging over his head since April 2001.<p>Best wishes,
Estes

I think your W has to be totally out of the A before she can get the spark back. You sound like you are doing all of the right things. You sound like you have a lot of patience.... that is important. I know I haven't been much help---but I feel so inexperienced in all of this! I am pulling for you!