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My mother-in-law got a call from H's XW today (first attempted contact in over 4 years). She contacted MIL at home and started asking her for H's social security number. MIL refused, and XW asked for a number for him up here. MIL again told her no, that she would take XW's number and call and give it to him up here. XW said that she was going into surgery in less than two hours, and that she needed his SSN as soon as possible. XW also went on to say that she had married some Army guy. <p>Now when my H filed for D, we didn't know how to get in touch with her (we were living in WA state, she had left SC), so we ran an ad in the newspaper. H and XW were married in 1992, and separated in 1993, with her returning to SC and him staying in San Diego (he was in the Navy). They never got around to getting a D or even a legal separation until H filed for legal separation in 1997 (when he and I began dating). She immediately shacked up with another man in 1993 and went on to have 3 kids by him. We filed for the D up here, and it was finalized in July of 1999 - the month before we got married. So she had no idea that we had gotten the D.<p>She's now trying to go for CHILD SUPPORT and ALIMONY! She (of course) wanted his SSN to try and stick him with this hospital bill because she's broke. My H is NOT the biological father of any of her kids, but she's going on the grounds of they were legally married when she had them, and their last name is the same as his. She's also trying to pull that he neglected her and all of this other BS. I am soooo angry right now I can't see straight. I don't know if this is legit, if she can do this? Right now I just want to go to KY and stomp a hole in her fat, bon-bon eating, Jerry Springer lovin' [censored]! I am SO angry!!! I really, really need to talk to someone like NOW - I'm at work and I'm falling apart!

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Ut Oh!! You are RIGHT, that is BAD!<p>I would think your H needs a lawyer, and YESTERDAY!!!<p>I will be praying, CB!!!<p>How are you otherwise???<p>Hugs,
Sheryl
(was Nyneve, went back to my old name, in case you didn't know)

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Carolina Belle,
I don't know law let alone your state's law. However how do you know she is trying to stick the bill & get child support ?. For now let her contact you guys and nothing you could do. I wonder how someone M and didn't have SSN ... even ex !. Could you afford attorney to ask question ?, specially if she is serious about it.

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Hey Sheryl, <p>Other than THIS, I'm 7 months along now and sick of being pregnant! [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] God, I'm like sitting here waiting for him to call me back - he was calling her on her cell phone, and that was an hour ago, and I've heard NOTHING yet! It's driving me nuts! These lovely pregnancy hormones are so not helping the situation. <p>We did find out that we're having another boy - Nicholas Aidan is what we're going to name him (provided they got the sonogram right this time - Michael was supposed to be a "Hailey"! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] )

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CB??<p>She can't do anything legal, Hon. All you and H have to do is get DNA test on the children, that should squelch this whole charade. Only stipulation on DNA tests is the kids have to be 6 months in age or greater.<p>She can threaten and use all the legal scare tactics, but bottom line is DNA will disprove him as the BIO-father.<p>Are you okay, CB?<p>Jo

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Redhat - H already talked to her once, that's how I found out about all this. He's called her again, and I'm still waiting for an update on that end.<p>That's the thing - I don't know if it would be our state laws here in WA or KY (where she is) that would be applicable! The South has some bizarre laws, so I wouldn't be surprised if she had some sort of legal ground.<p>Jo - I'm still freaked - like I said, in SC you are considered common-law married if you stay the friggin' night with a member of the opposite sex! That's what XW did - she used that law to take his last name and say that they were married (swear to God! They did get "legally" married later on, though)<p>I know HERE that it's all about DNA, and since I can't see a lawyer until Monday, I'm going to be stressing over this all weekend.<p>Hmmm, I wonder if I can counter-sue her for harrassment and emotional damages if I go into labor early?! [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>God, why hasn't he called back yet?!?!??!?!

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CB,<p>Okay, here is the number of our "Paternity" attorney (Christopher Keays) here in Tacoma. He specializes solely in Paternity cases and he's damn good, very aggressive. You should call him and tell him you're a referral and would like him to recommend a Paternity attorney there in BHam, K?<p>253.572.5323<p>Hope this helps, Hon.<p>Love you sweetie,
Jo<p>[ January 04, 2002: Message edited by: Resilient ]</p>

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CB, www.divorcesupport.com has a buletin to do your research plus have a forum to ask question. I did ask mine about child custody ... but get a conflicting answer, you could try at least while waiting.<p>Stay calm ....

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CB<p>Here is a lawyer in WA that offers free initial consultation I found through quick web search: http://www.tacomaattorney.com/<p>Call!!<p>And a web site for online info:<p>http://www.divorcelawinfo.com/states/wash/washington.htm<p>I believe- they were married and divorced in WA? If so then WA should apply?? Get real advice though.

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Thanks Jo!<p>I called, and I guess he no longer does family law, so they referred me to the Whatcom County Lawyer Referral (which I have to try and dig up).<p>H called back, and said that she was "crazy". She IS married to an army guy, and she's now saying that she needed the SSN b/c the military hospital showed that she was still married to him and wouldn't cover her bill. And she wants ALIMONY?

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Thanks Redhat and NY, I'll look into both leads.<p>No, they were married in South Carolina, separated in SC, and divorced in Washington. And she got remarried not even knowing that she was divorced! Real winner, this one!

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Here's the Link for the Whatcom County Lawyer Referral.<p>http://www.wsba.org/atj/services/whatcom.htm<p>And here's a number for free legal advice in WA State: 1-888-201-1014<p>[ January 04, 2002: Message edited by: Resilient ]</p>

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LOL, I reread this and I had to laugh. God, do I sound like an OW or what?! I guess technically I was (although circumstances were extenuating - see above). Yikes! [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img]

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Thanks Jo! <p>I'll BRB, have to go home! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

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I'm headed home as well. Won't be back on until 6:15 PST.<p>I'll look for you then, CB.<p>Ohhhh .... and CB, Please BREATH!!!!!

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CB,<p>This sounds like it might be rather easy....<p>She abandoned her H so he had to file for divorce and publish, the whole thing.<p>She then got married not knowing that she was divorced.<p>She then lived with her new H and had a few kids.<p>She cannot have it both ways....<p>Either she is married to your H and a bigamist or she is divorce and remarried.<p>If she is still married to your H, then it can be proven that the kids are not hers and that she abandoned him years ago. And she has committed a crime.. bigamy. So your H could press legal charges against her. Your H knew he was divorced so in this case your marriage would be null and void but it would be hard to show that he entered into bigamy with intent. But not so with her. <p>Do some research on the internet. There are some websites that give the state and federal laws on bigamy. <p>She may want to reconsider once she realizes that if she is not divorced, she has committed a crime.<p>On the other had, if she is divorce and remarried, she is filling a false claim. The courts do not like stuff like this.<p>As long as your H actually got a valid divorce, and I should be one. You guys are ok. Do not let her upset you too much. This is a stupid game and she is dumb enough to think she has ground to stand on.<p>
Looks like you will need a copy of the marriage certificat for her current marriage. How do you know that she really married him?

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Oh, and your H should not talk to the woman. He could be saying all sorts of things that will cause problems. Just turn this over to an attorney and let them handle it. We pay attornies to handle stuff like this so we can keep our sanity. Let the attorney do the worrying.

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CB, <p>Zorweb has some great advice, esp. the part about obtaining/ordering marriage certificates.<p>You can order both marriage and divorce certificates on-line at the County web-site where you filed. You can also check on-line to verify they are listed before ordering. <p>Almost every County now offers access on-line to these public records. You plug in the name(s) and the query returns a report real-time for you.<p>Lv,
Jo<p>[ January 04, 2002: Message edited by: Resilient ]</p>

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CB, <p>Snoop w/ www.ussearch.com w/ info on your hand you should get all the info about her that you need, including criminal records<p>I did it on WW's OM.<p>[ January 05, 2002: Message edited by: redhat ]</p>

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Hi CB,<p>long time no speak?<p>I thought you must have been doing well and ok.<p>I can remember being 7 months pregnant - they should have called SeaWorld for me. I was like a big beached whale!!!!!!!!<p>You guys sure have funny laws over there. Your H is NOT the father, but she wants alimony???<p>Can she do this?<p>Some women are fruitcakes. Plain and simple.<p>How the heck does her new H feel that she wants her ex-h SSN and not his. Surely that would have been easily explained at the hospital. Like, yes I was married to him, but now I'm NOT!!!!!! This is my H now!!!!!!<p>Fruitcakes, the lot of them!!<p>You take care of you girl, and that precious bump!<p>Don't stress about this. It sounds ridiculous. (I'm not making light of your feelings, just her)
She sounds ridiculous.<p>I'll be thinking of you, and waiting to see the outcome of this one!!<p>It sounds like she should be ON Jerry Springer, not just watching him. That is the most vile show I've ever watched. Seems to take all the dregs of society, with their weird and wacky ways, to try and justify them. Some of the topics - well - what's her name and I'll forward it!!!!!!!!!<p>hugs and prayers<p>Jo

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