My name is Bridgette. I hve been married now for almost 6 years and we have a 6 month old son. I have been told by my husand recently that he had an affair with someone from high school. I AM MAD,ANGRY, CONFUSED, HURT AND NUMB! I don't know what to do. All of these feelings and I have a child to think about. During his confession, my husband tells me "he wants to work on us, he loves me ....blah,blah, blah...." This sounds like a bunch of BS, if he "loves me" how could he have done this and why is it that he should even think that I could resume my life as his wife knowing that I was not deserving of the vows he made me simply because he was going though a mid-life crisis????? I don't know how to repair myself or my trust towards him. I feel like an even bigger fool because he knows that I love him and to him that is an advantage. I AM HUMILITATED! All I can think about is another woman touching him ---- him touching her, all that was special and sacred to me is now nothing and has been cheapend by this "mistake". What do I do ~ how do I pick up the pieces? I have no one to ask --- because I am embarassed that I love a man that could do this to me ---- I FEEL LIKE AN IDIOT to even say that I love him. How does anyone get over this, should I even get over this or screw him like he screwed me (no pun intended). Please help if you can.

I am so sorry for your pain. <p>Have you read this series of articles? Some good info...<p>www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi5061_qa.html<p>Good luck--<p>Kathi

B,
Today order the book TornAssunder by Carder,Look on this web site for the arcticle - how affairs start and how they should end, you read it then print it out for your H.
Give him some credit for coming clean with you.<p>This week look at the emotional needs stuff on here, then print out the test and you both take it.He should write no contact letter,(example also on this site)<p> Iknow you think that we have all been there but you hurt worse than any of us, but believe me we know your pain and panic.

PS
You may not believe it now, but it is possible for your husband to love you and have sex with someone else - he wasnt thinking of you at the time only himself.
It can be good again.
You know the answer to whether you should "try to show him how it feels" your a better person than that.
I will check on you later tonight, you can always e-mail me if you like.

B-<p>First and foremost, read everything you can get a look at on this site. I would strongly suggest buying and reading Surviving and Affair (from the site bookstore). It might provide some insight into why the A happened, what happens next, and what is possible in the future.<p>Know that you are not alone in this. Post here as often as you need to. Vent. Look deep inside yourself for YOUR part in the state of your marriage. Take TIME for you.<p>Please take care of yourself.
Kev