...I've decided it's time to have the moving back home talk with my wife. We're not even close to being ready for it as a couple, everything is still too new but it's becoming a financial must.<p>She knows that it might come to this but I think she's under the impression that we can pull it off. I've always had to be the realist when it comes to money so I look like the bad guy alot. Simply put, we can't continue in two places, come what may.<p>We're doing pretty well all things considered, this talk might shape the future of our marriage. This way if she decides she doesn't want to be in this marriage down the line she will be in a position to actually find her own place and such. Right now we're not there and I am not going to make our son pay for our mistakes. We'd be really stretching it to make it and even then I don't think it would work.<p>So, wish me luck on this everyone. I'll post on Sunday after we talk. I really think we can continue to work on things even living together, in fact from the input I've gotten here it seems it's almost a must.<p>I'll be praying for guidance on how to do this right. Advice welcome, I'll be back with an update Sunday or Monday.

Don't have much too add. Make it dry as financial transaction, to the point and show her the numbers and be ready. Do not get into LB at all. Just listen, don't talk or add comments, avoid arguments. I did this when I try to bait her to reject the offer and pull our property from the market. Think of win-win when you present it to her and actually more loose-win. Persent it in the angle of win for her. Good luck.

Seeking_Guidance,
Well I think you know my thoughts and prayers are with you. It's a real shame your family was split apart this way. Now that you know the truth, I think it's clear that to move back is the right thing to do. <p>The advice I'd offer you is this. Before you go to speak with her get clear in your mind if moving back is what you want to do. You've posted about some seriously fogged thinking on your W's part, and said she has opposed your moving back. I'm going to assume she will still oppose the idea. I would say this to you S_G, if you don't want to rile her, then just give up the idea - stay in your apartment. But if you want to move back, then just tell her that you're moving back, and do it, preferably right then and there before she has an opportunity to pull anything funny. I would not go there with the idea of discussing the issue, or trying to talk her into it. For you to beg the woman who betrayed you for permission to be in your own home is a humiliation you do not deserve. <p>So that's what I'd say S_G. Good luck....I'd get clear which way is best then go for it...Don't argue with her. She's a WS in the fog, it's like arguing with a drunk.
David

Dave,<p>I'm basically planning to announce to her that it's going to happen and why. This is definately not a beg situation and we're really out of options here. Neither of us can recover from this financially if we don't make a move right now.<p>She could very well leave the house because of this but it's something that I know HAS to happen for many reasons.<p>Thanks for the post, you too redhat, helps me through these tough times.