Hi Honey,<p>Thanks for your response. I can certainly understand your reaction to seeing your H with the OW. Luckily I am not really the confrontational type, although, I have done a couple things from a distance. A month and a half ago, I sent her an anonymous email. Of course, she ran to my H and told him and when he asked me I admitted it and reminded him of some really horrible things he said to me. He actually wasn't upset and said he shouldn't have said those things. Then, last Friday when I found out he was with her at the bar when he told me he was having no contact, I called her cell phone (which I have from my H's cell phone records) and left her a voicemail asking if she has any idea what she is doing to my family and I hope she can live with herself. My H said she was not real happy about it. Oh well, when you get yourself involved with a married man, you should expect things like this. <p>I am continuing to be really nice to my H (you know, killing him with kindness). I continue to believe in my heart that he doesn't really want to leave, but can't stay away from her and doesn't know what to do. I talked to him privately last night and asked if he had found a place to stay yet and he said he had to look at a few places, but needed to make sure it was month to month in case he really hates it and wants to come home. I asked his intentions with the OW and he said they talk, but that will be it. (Although he told me he purchased a new cell phone so the records won't come to my house). I reminded him, as one of my therapists had said I should do, that even though we are separated, we are still married and any contact with her is cheating. He said he knew that. He said his reason for doing this is to determine his feelings for me being apart. He said he would like me to be stronger and more independent and that would make me more attractive to him. That is what I am trying to do anyway for myself. I told him I will continue to pray he will come home and he said he wants me to do that. He just needs a little time apart to sort out his true feelings. He said he doesn't want to lie or hurt me any longer and that is why he is moving out for a while. <p>I realize now I will be okay if he leaves, but I would certainly rather have him in my life.<p>[ February 11, 2002: Message edited by: hurtandafraid ]</p>