My first sem. of college, I met my H. His mother died after we started dating. Got pregnant the second year of college. Got married in '96, had a beautiful baby girl. Started a deep and dark depression with anxiety. '98 had another beautiful baby girl. Shortly after, was diagnosed with dep. w/anx, began counseling and used St John's Wort. Later, started Zoloft. Things became clearer, I started functioning again. Can't tell when my last episode was (suicidal thoughts/no tendencies). Got pregnant with baby boy 2000. The baby boy H wanted so badly [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] . Had baby boy after a couple of complications (nothing real serious). 6 wks to 2 mos. after birth, H started working lo-o-ong hours (12-16/7 days). Sex was hurting so I told him that we would just worry about him, not to worry about me. He took that to mean I didn't want it at all. I don't know why, I thought I was clear. Apparently, he has a strong need for me to be pleased. Came home 2nd week of long hours and told me about B. A college kid who supported him in his work, more than I did (of course, I wanted him home sometimes!) I just had a baby with 2 other kids, having anxiety attacks occasionally. I mean...why wouldn't I want him home?! Anyway, he asked her and others about my support of him. Basically, she and everyone else said, "Your wife can't expect you to be home when she needs you. Isn't an hour at night once a week enough? I mean what does she expect?" (My version.) Ma'am (B) was very willing to flirt. After this one shift when they did all their flirting, he came home and said,"What am I doing? I have the most beautiful wife in the world!" His exact words. Then, he told her he didn't want to flirt with her anymore. I went to see the event he was working on at work (he's in entertainment.) I saw her. She made no effort to meet me. I thought she seemed jealous and told H he should talk to her. I told him, I didn't think it was wise for him to get rides with her anymore (did I forget this?) This isn't looking good is it? He told her, I said he couldn't get rides and that I was angry. What?! Anyway, he said it's over with. But then she makes a comment that when he was getting his bp taken for Health fair at work, "When I came in, did your BP go up?" He said, "No, only W does that to me. As a MofF, it was the lowest it's ever been." Then (my story's getting jumbled here), before that, I gave him HN/HN. She asked what he got for his b-day, he told her and she said," Isn't it a little late for that?" Huh?! I thought exposure (me) would be the cure for this situation, so I went out to his work with the kids a lot. She made a point to not be around. When we first met, she soon left where I was and found something else to do. I told H, it looks like more is going on than I was told. He insisted not. He didn't know why she seemed so scared of me. She makes personal comments like there was another MM she was flirting with. Someone told his wife that others said they were having an affair. Why would she tell my H? Last time I went out to his work and she saw me, she froze like a deer in headlights. What's that all about. I check H's schedule. I know when they work together. I ask him, everything he says is verifiable. I've made several friends at his work and talk regularly to one. Everything checks out. H is ready, I think, to give her the shove off. I don't think he's having to work with her as much now. Oh yeah, last encounter with H and her together with me...She watched H carefully. Didn't initiate play with my kids. My kids did. Hahahaha. Made little eyecontact with me. When H and I were talking, she'd interrupt. H didn't look at her as much as he did me. Then, H looked as though he'd been rolling in the sand from the place he worked on before (beach area). She goes,"You're filthy...You've even got it behind your ear" I added in a girly voice,"Here let me wipe it off for you." I was standing right there. I asked him a question. She came and stood right behind him. ? He pulled out his schedule...she pulled out hers...he put it back...she put hers back.???
Anyone have any insight? This started back in May '01.

IMHO, an EA gone sour and a sour 'ol OW lemonhead! [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Let your H keep showing his attention and affection for you. Keep in contact with him though, sounds like this OW is out for the kill and a carcass of a H is not worth it. <p>What points from His needs/Her needs did you and your H enjoy?<p>L.

I found I'm a very needy person [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] . All of the EN's I ranked high. I even have some of the usual men's needs (possibly because I was raised by my dad.) Everything was way high, I tied a bunch of them. H has read some of the book. I think it encouraged me to get off my rear and get housework done because that's his second biggest thing...I think. He's in the middle of taking the questionnaire now. I also started making myself up nearly everyday and have gained self-confidence. A lot of people have speculated that I might be preggers just because I've been glowing. I'm not. H had operation. I sold Mary Kay and when this all broke, in an effort to show her my feathers weren't ruffled, I told H to ask if she wanted to buy some. She said, "I don't wear makeup." H said she needs it. Says her breakouts are really bad. I rarely have breakouts, when I do they are minimal...plus one for W! I also have green eyes which H loves. You didn't ask all that though, did ya? Anyway, I'm looking good, feeling pretty good. Started my Zoloft again last night to help with me getting my house cleaned. I've started exercising, again. I'm off and on. I'm eating less to try to maximize weight-loss (1500cal.). Avoiding chocolate and fast-food. We've been trying to save some money to go rock-climbing together. H started climbing at work and enjoys it. Thinks he'd like to rock-climb for fun. I had been thinking the same thing, but I think it's $60 to go. Maybe we should with my b-day money which is tomorrow. H asked me my size last night after going to the store. [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] . Thanks for your reply Orchid.