My sister needs some encouraging words and I know there are alot of caring, wise people on this board who could say some nice things.
She's divorced- no infidelity involved, but a remote husband who wasn't there for her. (Like she had gall bladder surgery and he didn't even bother to take the day off from work). Finally, the lack of giving destroyed the marriage.
So she's been a single mom with 2 kids. Her X is a good father, but it's hard- he was dating within 2 months of their separation after telling my sister he would never marry again.
My sis got involved, after divorce, with a 9 years younger guy. They clicked intellectually, but he never really treated her right. He moved away and they continued the relationship long distance. There was fun along the way, but ultimately.....this guy was commitment phobic, couldn't deal with her two daughters etc. So two and half years later.......she knew it had to end, but was hanging on...(after all how can you maintain a long distance relationship when the guy doesn't want you to visit during Easter break because you have your kids with you that vacation?) so he ended it, said it's just too much of a hassle etc.
And my sister is just feeling SO SO brokenhearted. Yes she knows intellectually that he wasn't worthy, wasn't enough etc./ but it is so hard when you give your heart to someone, really love them, you're loyal, you work hard, but that person just throws your heart away.It's been nine days, and she's been crying every day, feeling SO SO sad. Trying to do the right things to cheer herself up but she feels so lonely at the end of the day when he would usually call.......
So if you have a moment, please post a few words of encouragement, and I'll have her check in.....
My sister is such a great person, really loving and giving, interesting, smart, pretty, active (rockclimbing and outdoorsy) but at the same time, working on her PhD.......I have to believe she will find true love someday.

Hi Lil Sis,<p> Absolutely you will find true love at some point. When you do, you will think back on these times and wonder what the heck you were thinking. <p> I know this is hard for you right now. The pain you are in sucks(for lack of a better word...lol).<p> What you need to do now is refocus on your goals in life. Where are you going? Get that Phd and worry about love and all the rest later. Focus on your kids and enjoy them while you can. They are your life right now. Love will come. Just don't rush it.<p> Sorry for your pain. Come here and talk to us. Email me if you like. jdmac1@yahoo.com<p> jd<p>[ February 13, 2002: Message edited by: jdmac1 ]</p>

Hey come on, does anyone else out there have a word of hope and encouragement? Much appreciated!

Hi Espoir and Sis im sorry to read of your pain.
And yes you will find someone worthy of all the love you have to give.<p>Im sure out there somewhere is a lovely bloke that will love you and your lovely children just as if they were his own.<p>I speak from experiance on that bit, my Dad is stepdad to me my sister and brother and he has brought us up since my brother was 18months old (he was 40 last week)
We could not have had a better Dad.<p>I know at the moment your world has fallen apart, but it will get better and you will see that he was not the one.
Sending big hugs to you.
take care.
Liz

Try the book, Letting Go, by Zev Wanderer and Tracy Cabot. It is behavioral therapy, and it really does work.<p>Found several copies available at Half.com at 0.75 cents:<p>http://www.half.com/cat/buy/prod.cgi?cpid=753821<p>They also had suggestions for other books of that type on that page.<p>[ February 13, 2002: Message edited by: Conqueror ]</p>