I wrote this note to my H this morning, I want to know if I messed up and have recovery to do. If so how? I know I should've posted it first but it was one of those spur-of-the-moment things. This is not his V-day thing, but something I think my heart had to say.<p>"It's Valentine's Day today, I isn't an easy one for me as I wish that I was filling your heart with love for me. But since I am not I will love you and wait for the day that you are ready to let me fill that beautiful spot once again, more complete and meaningful that ever before. You fill my heart with such happiness and warmth, without even trying. I am your gift from God, maybe a bothersome gift in the past, but He cleaned me up on the inside-one day, given the chance, and with work you will love me as I do you and be able to see the beauty within. I want t walk with you by the ocean, hold your hand as we watch out little girl grow, be by your side as your friend, lover, and companion, I want to grow old with you and even then be kept warm at night by your loving arms. <p>I love and cherish you and wish for that day when you do me. I want to make you happy!<p>I love you with all tha I am and all I can be.<p>Love,
Your wife,
Melina

Don't worry about it. It expresses your feelings and is therefore, not a love buster.<p>I think anything you do to try to cover for this now would only dig a hole. Leave it be. It's a beautiful letter. If he is not receptive to it, it is his loss.

FnH,
Very beautiful, well done!
Hope you have a decent day. Feb 14th is always hard when in recovery. (((hugs))) cl

Sometimes you feel that just expressing your feelings is a LB. That is why I am asking! Thank you for your encouragement. Have a good Feb. 14th too, (a Hallmark Holiday..hee...hee) ((((((((((hugs right back))))))) [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

You spoke with your heart and you did not say anything mean or hurtful. You did not mess up. Please don't worry about giving him the note. If he does not mention to you that he read it, don't mention it to him. Let the words sink in over time. Continue to show him love and he will feel what you have said.<p>Don't despair and don't beat yourself up. We get enough of that anyway.

WOW! It is sounding like I did something that I can feel good about. Still scared tho! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Tack on to origional question, I was thinking of sitting down with him on sunday to ask where we are at. Yea, Nay. Remember he was home for two months and left for a week sunday he will have been back for 2 weeks. Of course there have been two instances with the OW but he seems so much warmer. What to do-What to do ! [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img]

Give it more time. Don't ask. (I am talking to myself as much as I am to you with that.) <p>Spend time together having fun. Don't push, just have fun. It seems like the closer they come to making a decision the more harm it does to push. There does not seem to be any such thing as a gentle nudge when it comes to the WS. Let him come back in his own time. It seems like he is getting there, but just needs some more time.<p>Just my thoughts.

I know that deep inside, I just think that V-Day, the crying mood I am in and hope are trying to push me... I just needed to hear it from someone else. Thank you. How is your situation going?

Right now I am trying to remember not to push him or ask if the OW is out of the picture. If I let this get to me, my last five weeks in NY will be miserable. I go home for the weekend next Friday and hopefully I will be able to figure something out then. He is going to leave work a little early to pick me up at the airport. I am not sure what he has planned, if anything. <p>He did tell me Tuesday night that three of his friends had invited him to go somewhere for the weekend but that he was not going. When I asked why he said that it was one of the weekends that I am coming home. I think that is a good sign. <p>Hang in there. I will be praying for you.

It does sound like a good sign...I will add you to my prayers. You take care of you. My thoughts and (((((((((hugs))))))))