Ok, I have a coworker for whom I am supposed to be a mentor (professionally). She has recently had a baby who had birth trauma and some related physical problems. This has put a strain on her marriage.<p>There is another coworker who is a really nice guy, great friend, would be great to tell him all my troubles - but I kept out of that trap! (Actually no one at work knows I have a WH, someone even said to me last week that I seemed to have one of the strongest marriages among people in our department. Ha Ha) <p>But ... they are spending WAY too much time together. One person confronted them on it, and they just said that there was nothing going on and he was just listening to her troubles. Other people have told me they are uncomfortable with the amount of time those two spend together, go off to lunch together, etc.<p>Any advice for me? I think I would rather lose their friendship IF it did any good than to see two marriages suffer the fallout that might be in the works here.

My advice will differ from most around here =P I would say to just leave it alone for the time being, or at the most, perhaps have a conversation with the person you're mentoring to about how it might be disrupting the work environment (as other co-workers have brought it to your attention that it makes them uncomfortable, and because you are in a professional mentor role with her). If you're in a friendship relationship with her, prhaps be supportive of her without trying to downplay her problems or emotions, and encourage her to have more open communication with her H.<p>The bottom line is, though...these two coworkers more than likely won't listen at best, and may find you intrusive at worst. Without concrete proof that there's an affair going on, I don't think that there's a whole lot you could do for them (and even then, it's doubtful whether you would help more than harm by getting involved)...they have to do the hard stuff on their own.<p>[ February 15, 2002: Message edited by: TowardsTheFuture ]</p>

Yeah, that's pretty much what I figured. <p>Since the other person who confronted them didn't get anywhere, I don't think I would either. So I'll hang around and see what happens next.<p>BUT what I wonder is how to cut off people who come talk to me about it because I don't want to be "talking behind their back."