I want to thank all of you out there for your kindness and support as I have been traveling this roller coaster.. my V day was very nice, but I wish for more... no card this year... a gift... and a dinner, and the night before... which was suppossed to be v day dinner... a foreign film and a nice pasta dinner... but my H wanted to know what he wuold do with the tickets to the specail valentines dinner at the nice club downtown up high with a view with the special chef dinner, and the harpist... ? I had sd I had to work on v day night, well, I changed my plans and got 2 nights out... it was quite wonderful... I know I lbed a few times... it is so hard with a drink in me... I slip and get sarcastic... I seem to want him to proclaim his love for me, and promixe everlasting faithfulness... but those lb's do not get me there... jsut my kindness and my plan a work and attitude... <p>My H really sees how much I love him, much to thank to plan a and the support I have gotten here... Unfortunatley my newest marital therapist is also reccomending I possibly file for the big D... boy am I tired of therapists reccomeneding this... what I told him when i started with him, was my last therapist was pushing me to D, and I did not want that... I wanted someone to help save the marriage... well, he is not... at this point... basically, 2 therapists are saying if he does not stop drinking, D him...<p>Well yes, I have issues with the drinking, but more issues with the affair... OK? Yes, I would like less drinking, yes, I think the drinking led to the affair, but does this mean I require end to drinking for him to come home? these therapists say I should... I am saddened... i only want our happiness..<p>Thanks to everyone here again, we are doing much better... It is amazing what pure love can do.<p>I had a very nice time, but yes, I long for more... and I do wonder , can he do it? I do know he will do much more without my insitance or demandng or without my sarcasticness about the A.<p>Thanks, hints on anything welcomed! Honey