Let me start by saying I never called you a bad mother. I expressed concern for a 5 year old child who was awake at 2 am discussing the OW, even if by name as you later stated.<p>Most of what I have learned here in regard to saving my marriage has been gleaned by reading others posts, not so much by posting myself. There are many many caring and helpful people on this board and I give them much credit for the place where my marriage is today. The intuitiveness and support here can not be surpassed.<p>Now with that said I will explain my stance on my issue with you. I have a 5 year old also. I know that the attention and care that goes into a child that age doesn't leave me much free time to do anything, yet you appear to have time enough to post here several times each day and night. You don't appear to be upset or angry or hurt or any of the things that go along with the discovery of an affair. I tend to be leery of things that don't fit the mold and if I'm wrong about you then I apologize. However if I am on the mark then the judgment will come from a higher place.<p>You seem to be a clone of the OW in my life maybe that's why I was so quick to judge. Don't worry though, for I won't be back. I'm sorry to have ruffled so many feathers but I always speak my mind and follow my heart and this is where it has led me. <p>Luck and happiness to each of you and thank you so much for showing me the way. I'll be ever grateful for finding this place.

totally-lost, Upset and anger happend months ago, all that is left is pain and determination. My daugher has school so I can post. And you may have not said it ain so many words but that is what the tone of your words were. I am sorry if I was wrong And she wasn't up at 2 am! That is what bothred me, you didn't take the time to ask the facts...you just assumed. Good luck to you. I will pray for the Lord to help you in your situation.
To everyone else, sorry to have caused so much trouble, I guess hurt feelings on top of existing hurt feelings got to me. I felt safe here. I may try to post again...but I will no longer feel safe. Totally Lost I hope you don't leave you seem to have many friends here. Don't lose them, Please.

Hi Faith and TL dont want to poke my nose in but it would be good if you both stayed.
There is enough hurt and pain in your personal lives without falling out on MB.
We cant all agree with everything thats said here, and misunderstandings do happen.
Would be nice to see you put it behind you and shake hands, and both continue to come here for help and support.
Take care.
Liz

TL and FnH,<p>Ladies, please. Don't leave. There are hundreds of people who post and read on this forum. Don't let a difference of opinion with ONE person out of hundreds keep either one of you gaining support and wisdom from the rest. And don't deprive us from the insight that each of you can give the rest of us. Please reconsider.<p>Estes

Just want to say that I competely agree with lizzel. There's enough pain, torment and confusion in our lives that we don't need to go and add to it. This little space gives many of us comfort, support, help and the advice that we need to keep going.<p>Here's a big <<<<e-hug>>>> for both of you - our place here would be diminished without learning from each other [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>- Freddy

Ladies.....please. Both of you stay....and maybe agree to disagree.<p>All of us here run high on emotions from time to time.
I've had my share...as has everyone else.<p>Please stay as I'm sure that both of you have something to share.

To TL,<p>I just wanted to say that I reread my other post and let you know that I don't think I am perfect (like you thought that, right?). It did sound judgemental and I am sorry. I did it out of concern for both of you. I wanted you to know that I thought you were mistaken so that if you agreed, perhaps you would stay. I wasn't judging you, just what you said. And, now I remember, I said something worse to someone a while ago. I was hoping to maintain an equilibrium here, not usher you out the door. The others apparently want you to stay and I agree with what they say as a basis for you staying. Please do reconsider. Also, part of what I said, I wanted FNH to know that others believed in her. Another aspect, those who lurk here would know that personal attacks are not tolerated. I hope I did this in a worthwhile manner and hope you understand my reasoning. I hope I can also get to know you some more through this board and help and gain help from you. Everyone here is valuable. And your, call-it-like-you-see-it approach is just what some people need. However, it must be balanced out. (Boy this is full of qualifiers, isn't it. Sorry about that.) Please take care and please come back.
I need to go now because I have been neglectful of my kids today. Now, I've got a mess to clean up. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/blush.gif" border="0[/img]

Please stay, I have had my feeling hurt here too, but all in all it is a good place.. we are all hurting, and sometimes accidents happen! Hugs to both of you- lets forgive and go on!<p>Honey

Honey, Cali, everyone actually, I enjoy you and don't feel so alone here. I will think about staying.