I don't know why this is happening. I am feeling really insecure today for some reason. <p>Here's the short version. My partner and I dated two years ago for about two years. He cheated (more than once), I wasn't exactly honest either. Now we are rebuilding our relationship and everything has been great. He has not reneged on even one promise, he has truly been my friend. Above all else we have developed a very good friendship.<p>So why all of a sudden do I feel insecure? I have not had this problem in a long time.<p>He has given me no reason whatsoever to think he's doing anything wrong.<p>Things have been going well for the most part. No unusual problems.<p>Does this come in "spurts" for some people that have been betrayed?<p>Thanks,
Clear

Hi Clearview... I am sure it is normal to have doubts... it is hard to trust outright, and I think smart not to... keep trusting, but do be careful, it sounds that you are gaurded for a reason.<p>I had an exboyfriend.. who eventually became my Husband, and then my exhusband... we were only married 10 months... I do think the beginning of the end in htat relationship was his cheating and lying about it.... and my eventual fidning out... it really ruined everything I thought he was to me... and that is sooo sad.. but he was not right for me... in many other ways.. I was also to young to worry and too hurt to care.. and had another waiting in the wings for me... my current H.. now He I thought was a different story for me completely... but here we are 10 yrs later and my H is trying to say that I am the one who makes him cheat on me...<p> If we do work this out, me and my h, I assume I will be there with you. Wondering at times...<p> Are you following a prescribed plan of recovery, you are not married and no kids, right? Well, that is for a less stress relationship , if so, that is nice... <p> Look through the recovery links.. .it sounds like you are there.. you may even want to post this under recovery.<p> HOpe you start feeling a little better! Hugs, HONEY

Same reason you don't stick your hand in a light socket! You know it will hurt you because it did before. You're afraid of repeating the same mistakes ... but<p>Neither of you is the same person you were two years ago and I bet you've learned so much here that this time it will be so much better.<p>Why are you feeling insecure? Because you're human like the rest of us and we all have doubts sometimes about even the best thing we ever found.

Clear: Don't dwell on the fact that you are insecure right now. It's normal, expected, and above all - ok. You are opening your heart to this man, and you are taking down walls that were build for a reason. You feel vulnerable and are fearful of being hurt. It's normal, my friend. Don't feel you have to drop your guard all together, or tear all those walls down at once. Be cautous with your heart if you wish, it's yours. However, don't be afraid of the future simply because of the past.<p>Good luck,and I pray your day gets better.

Hi Clear! I logged off and remembered I forgot to post to you - so I came back...
Yes, it's normal, very normal. Things are going GREAT for us right now but I still have those days filled with doubts and insecurities. Hang in there, be strong, and work through it...this to shall pass....<p>Hugs,
JJ

Thank you everyone. I know you are right. I HATE when I have those times. <p>Just waiting for it to pass...

Clear~<p>I don't have much to offer you in way of support....other that it is wise for you to not completely trust him. You have reason to not trust....and taking that mistrust and working through it will provide you with the answers you need.....(I think........although right now I'm pretty confused myself [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] ) <p>{{clear}},<p>sel

Trying, trying, TRYING!!!<p>I HATE these insecurities. I am such a "preacher" of "don't worry about things you can't control". I don't know WHAT is with me today. Arghhhhh!!!!