WHAT AN A**HOLE!!!!!!!!!
I was sitting here, just talking to a friend whom I hadn't heard from in ages, and I get an IM from someone I don't know. I like to know how people get my IM screen name as it isn't given out very often, so I pressed to find out who it was. As it turns out, IT WAS HIM!!
I am sick now and my hands are shaking. I told him, as soon as I found out who it was, that I am happily married. That I don't want to be contacted EVER again, that I do not wish to be reminded of the mistakes I have made. I told him do not send me anymore flowers (as he did on Feb 4th, marking the day we met). Then I told him he was a selfish disgusting man and at that he signed off.
I IMMEDIATELY called H (who is at work) and told him EVERYTHING. I read the whole IM screen to him and tried to calm down my shaking hands. I am so PISSED!!!! H was so sweet, asked if I needed him to come home. I told him I was ok, that I would come here and RANT!!!!
Part of me feels great being able to tell him that I am married and HAPPY, tell him that he was a mistake. But part of me knows that I hurt him and I don't like that. I don't WANT to hurt anyone, but he DESERVED it!! D*** HIM!!! I wish I could tell him sometimes everything about him that pissed me off. Just verbally lash out that way he so often did at me.
Then I realize that I am spending WAY TOO MUCH of my energy thinking about a jerk like him. That I have much better things to think about...like pond scum, or rotten fish. How about toe jam or putrid body fliuds? I would just as soon think about those things than him!
I LOVE MY HUSBAND!!! I thanked him just yesterday morning for loving me and taking me back. I was driving to work and was overcome with love for him and I missed him so. I called him and told him all that. I started crying, not sure why, but I felt so IN LOVE with him it hurt. Now I sit here and can't wait until he gets home....<p>Thanks for listening! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Good for you. [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>You did a great job!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Informing him of no-contact and immediatly informing your H were the best things you could do in a situation like that.<p>One thing you might think about is creating a new screen name. Something that he won't recognize. This shouldn't be too difficult since you stated that you have released your current one to so few people.
just a thought...

Mrs WLD,<p>Probably you should send OM to gloryb.com, let him howl in there. What a looser. You did great job and at least you have a chance to tell him what you really think of him. Change your IM's name.

Yes I agree. You did an awesome job, especially by immediately telling H what happened. I'm sure he appreciated your honesty.

Mrs. WLD<p>All I can say is...<p> [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>You da bomb!

You are AWESOME! great job! thank you for this quote:<p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr> I was driving to work and was overcome with love for him and I missed him so. I called him and told him all that. I started crying, not sure why, but I felt so IN LOVE with him it hurt. <hr></blockquote><p>This is a dream come true for all of here!

A really good rant!<p>You expressed appropriate anger toward the OM who has ignored your expressed decision to rejoice in your happy marriage and have no further contact with OM. When you express appropriate anger, you need not feel as though you hurt his feelings deliberately. If his feelings are hurt crossing your marriage boundaries, that is actually a great gift to him. You gave the OM a gift ...... the truth. He can now process the truth as best he can.<p>YOU did good woman!<p>Pepper

Hello all,
A new screen name is on it's way. I tried to do it last night, but am just inept enough with computers that I couldn't figure it out! Although I was still so shaken up that perhaps THAT is why I couldn't do it. <giving myself SOME credit!> [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]
Telling my H wasn't even a question. We have both gotten so good at radical honesty...I thanked him not too long ago for the way he reacts when I tell him something unpleasant. He completely follows the Harley's advice, no yelling or getting angry. Just listening lovingly and being reassuring. I told him that that has made it very easy for me to be able to tell him anything. Luckily, there hasn't been much for me to be afraid of talking about! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Pepper, thanks for putting that into perspective for me. I have never been someone who is at all comfortable KNOWING I have hurt someone. But you are correct, now he has the truth and will no longer wonder. Let him feel as bad as he wants, that's his price for dwelling in my life!<p>THANK YOU all for your beautiful support! I feel so lucky to have a place to turn to where folks KNOW what I am feeling and working towards. Bill and I are doing wonderfully in our recovery. We have been through hell and the road has gotten much easier to travel, knowing that we are on it
together.
Thank you all again! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Ditto the others. You did very well. A new screen name is good. And blocking him in IM works too.