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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 205
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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 205 |
I have a friend who is about to go on vacation. Somehow he met a married woman on the internet. She is planning on being in the same area as him at that time on vacation also. While on vacation, and away from her husband, she wants to play. <p>His logic. Somebody’s going to sleep with her might as well be me. I'm not married; I have no commitment. And I don't even know her… So if she decides I 'm the guy so be it. I will decide if I want to or not. I think I would fell bad if I did, but on the other hand I feel like I have been treated this way by other women and I'm just tired of being good !!!! I t doesn't seem like it matters to most people. If I was married I would never even consider it!!!!!<p>
What argument, besides it’s WRONG, can I give him that would make sense.
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Joined: Dec 2001
Posts: 407
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Joined: Dec 2001
Posts: 407 |
I'm not sure what you could tell him...<p>We can't walk other people's paths for them...your friend will do what he wants to do regardless of what you have to say about it. I would be logical and non-judgemental...he may have some kind of issues that prompt him to get involved with women who are unavailable to him...what could these issues be? How could you help him face or deal with these issues? You're his friend, not his judge, right? All we can do is present our case to people, and it's up to them to agree to see our point of view if they CHOOSE to. We can't force it on them or "punish" them if they disagree.<p>Maybe let him come here and read a bit about some of these people have suffered from their spouses's affairs. Maybe it might get him to thinking about the effects his actions may have?
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 1,170
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 1,170 |
How does he feel about her husband? He wouldn't consider it if he was married, but it's okay for him to do it with another married person?<p>Does he know where she's been? What about STD's? <p>Other than that, I don't know. It's his choice, but it isn't logical.
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 967
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 967 |
He should consider the std thing for sure. If she's out looking for men on the internet and she's married, I'm sure he won't be her first. Also, could you ask about if she has children?<p>If he were married, I'd find a way to tell his wife but I guess that's not the case. Yes, he could come here and see the devastation it has caused to other lives. Maybe he should think about if her H finds out and comes after him? She must have left some kind of trail on the internet. Even when you delete files, they can be retrieved!
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 23
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 23 |
This is how I see it. I have also put it to my WW this way:<p>Would you walk up to a person on the street (that you've never met and don't know enough about to care for) and kill him/her for no reason other than that someone you barely know told you to? No, you wouldn't... because it's morally wrong.<p>If you sleep with a married person, you are hurting someone (thier spouse) badly that you don't know at all. Could be a very good person. Just because the person you sleep with wants to, does not make it right. It's 'morally' wrong. Tell your buddy to check his morality out. Personally, I think a person that would sleep with someone who is married is just as bad as a person that would hurt someone they didn't know on the street just for kicks.
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Joined: Jun 2000
Posts: 8,069
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Joined: Jun 2000
Posts: 8,069 |
Seek out and print some of the most devistating threads by BS's (shouldn't be hard to locate). Then hand them to him. <p>Jo
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