I have been here and posted under another name- but now my WH is following me around the boards, reads what I post (albeit RARER than RARE that I do) and then proceeds to freak out on me in anger..
My question is this...the M is over- in my heart- I am dead- (my name pretty well sums it up)..<p>Is it a BAD thing if I am just biding my time?<p>Some days I do feel like I love him- but so much has changed- and he had sex with SOO many other people..I am young- and do not ever ever EVER want to travel that same path twice.<p>The only action I can think to take is to divorce- but D-Day was a year ago- and it will be atleast another year before alot of our debt is paid off, etc...<p>If I file right now- my daughter cannot go to pre-school (it is expensive where we live and she is VERY smart and ready for school but misses the deadline for Kindergarten)<p>If I file right now- I will have NO MONEY left for ANYTHING extra for the 3 kids- I won't be able to get my debts paid off alone- I will barely be able to afford clothes and school supplies for them...<p>The kids also are majorly needing him too- we have moved 1200 miles away from family and friends- and they need him.<p>I also do in a way. He says he loves me, has not cheated since prior to D-Day- but many many basic things have NOT changed in him- and we still aren't effectively communicating.<p>We have never been to counseling because I refuse marriage counseling- in my eyes- my marriage is over and I feel dead and lifeless inside...<p>I have a long story- but won't share it-<p>Can anyone please tell me how long it took to "get your ducks in a row"?<p>What were some reasons you stayed? Finances? Kids? What was the end result?<p>I know that I might get blasted harshly- but all I can seem to muster right now- is that my marriage is only a business relationship- and I need to stay emotionally and physically detached or else I will be further destroyed..<p>Someone please help??<p>Thank you!
ECO