Well, I must say that this has been a day to day battle.I had asked my WS to be honest with me if he had any contact with the OW, on Wed.he called me at work and told me she had just called our home and talked to him. That she called to tell him she was sorry if she had caused any problems, and that she had lost her job, had no friends around here and that she was moving. He said she was very upset.(do I care).
Any how, at least he did tell me she called. Then on Thur. he didnt come home from work until 3 hours later. He came in kissed me and said that he does not want to give me false hope but the he is not ready to give up on us yet. He advised that he wants me to be patient with him. He said that he had went to a donut shop and just thought about everything and that is where he had been for the 3 hours.
I hope him I do forgive him, and he just says I am a fool, but I am his fool.
I never know what each day will bring, happy, sad, mad, ect. But I do know that I love this man so very much. We have 2 children together and they are trying to deal with all this as well. I guess I am just really confused. I want to keep blaming a mid-life crisis on all of this.
This man has always been a dependable, loving husband and father, and the things he has done in the past few months just are not him. I am willing to wait and pray that everything works out. Does anyone have any ideas on how to fall in love all over again and to have an even better marraige than before. I would do anything for this man, he is my world. But I also know that at some point I must draw a line if it becomes to much for me or my kids.
I know that he feels like he is useless, and that we can never get past his affairs, but there is nothing I can do, other than keep loving and supporting him to show him that.
Man my life is a mess right now.
Any help out there?

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Does anyone have any ideas on how to fall in love all over again and to have an even better marraige than before.
--------------------------------------------------<p>Yes, you've come to the right place. Have you read the info. on this site? Have you and your husband read His Needs Her Needs and more importantly SAA (Surviving an Affair).<p>In SAA there are the four rules of recovery to help you start off recovery after learning of an affair. The whole theory of MB is how to rebuild love and make your marriage the best it can be.<p>Note, that the spouse who is ending the affair will go through a period 3 weeks or longer of witrhdrawal symptoms - just like someone stopping drugs or alcohol. Both spouses need to understand that so they don't misinterepret those feelings as not wanting to work on the marriage. The BS needs to support the WS during this time. Then after withdrawal you can start to work on meeting each other's needs.<p>Read all you can about this and fill out the questionaires (you can print them off this site). It would be good if eventually you could both fill out the EN and LB one, but if your H isn't ready, just fill them out as if you were your H, and start Plan A.<p>Make sure you have a support system during this time -friends, family, church, counselor, and God.<p>I know that life is confusing right now, but hopefully after reading some of these things you'll have a better understanding of where you've been and where you are going. <p>Take each day one day at a time. It will be rocky at first, but hang in there. Post here with questions and don't forget to take care of you! K

One of our counselors told us that if we would just pretend to like each other things would start going smoother.<p>They did. We made sure to kiss hello and goodbye, be polite, and do all the things that we had forgotten to do over the years. The things that mean so much but are given up so easily. <p>I guess that is like a baby plan A. Read about plan A on this site, and see if that might not be a good idea for you.<p>Good luck, any questions holler<p>Elizabeth