Husband 43 yrs. told me he was traveling to Florida when in fact he was in Atlantic City w/ cousin 21 years old. Cousin was in the States for about a month. She came to this Country to marry someone else. H. and cousin slept together w/o protection. We have three children, 18, 18, 13. I kicked him out of the house. H. Now living w/ parents. H. going through midlife crisis. I have not gotten a chance to talk to him about the affair. The cousin is no longer here. She was sent back to her country. My children are very upset by this whole thing. So many unanswered questions. He is acting like a jerk...! [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img]

Hi poison and Welcome to Marriage Builders. I am sorry that you are here, but you are in good company with the trouble you are having. I would suggest that you start off reading everything you can, beginning with this thread:<p>http://www.marriagebuilders.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic&f=37&t=016810<p>That will give you a good start. And hang in there and just know that the situation is not hopeless.

Sorry, Poison, that you are in a position to need to be here, but Melody is right--you've come to the right place to get the help you need.<p>If you follow the instructions on the link she provided, you will be off to a good start. Pay close attention to the How to Survive Infidelity series of columns in the Q&A section of the website, and order the book, Surviving An Affair, as soon as possible. Doing all of this reading will give you the tools you need to understand what happened in your marriage and to help you to develop a plan for recovery from the trauma that has occurred in your most important relationship.<p>Know that you are not alone, even with the incest part of your case. My family of origin has been torn apart by the adultery of two first cousins. It is doubly disgusting when both adulterers are related to all the children involved--the children whose lives they don't mind destroying. Not to mention how it affects the rest of us.