This is the second post I have made. My husband left 2/17/02. He said it was to "think". We have been together for 16 years, married 14. He has had several affairs, the last that I am aware of was 2 years ago. The OW called me!!!! She was upset because she had been trying to get him to come "back" to her for 9 months and he wouldn't even talk to her. I confronted him and gave him the option of staying and working it out or divorcing. He wanted to stay and said he would remain faithful. I am not sure if he has nor not. <p>He says to him I am too overweight (which I am not), and that he wants me to look the way I did 16 years ago. (who doesn't)<p>We have had a few "dates" and several lunches, but, he still will not come back home. When I ask him if he wants a divorce, he says he "doesn't know".<p>I am totally lost without him. I have a good job. I actually make more money than he does, so financial security isn't an issue. I just plain miss him. <p>I don't know what to do. I want him to come home, but I know I can't make him.<p>There was a woman that worked with him that I suspected was also an OW. He fired her two days ago, and since, he hasn't even talked to me. That raised an eyebrow too. He said that nothing was going on between them and that I was welcomed to have him followed, or whatever I needed to do to justify in my mind that he was not seeing anyone else. He is either a good liar or he's telling the truth. <p>One part of me thinks that if there was someone else, he would just ask for a divorce and go on with life. I don't understand why he is putting me through so much grief.<p>I haven't been able to eat for 3 days. I managed to keep some scrambled eggs down, but anything else, I can't even swallow.<p>I have allowed myself to be so dependent on him mentally. I like just knowing he is there.<p>I am so lost without him. My job is suffering because I can't concentrate. I am a System Engineer of a huge law firm so I really need to be on my toes when someone has a problem. I don't even want to look at anyone right now. I just want to go somewhere and hide in the dark.<p>Life shouldn't be so difficult.
