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#991545 04/07/02 07:51 PM
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WH intiated a divorce the 14 of Feb.<p>I signed admission papers on the 6th of March.<p>I e-mailed WH asking for response to some questions regarding the demise of marriage March 6.<p>WH didn't respond for a week or better. Once he responded I sent letter describing my wants and needs in this divorce so that we can start negotiations. (His idea to save money on lawyers)<p>No response til March 19th (daughters b day) WH said I was asking for too much $$$ (I know that I am, but needed some place to start for negotiations). I asked WH to give me a dollar amount. Nothing, nilch, nada from WH. He was even here for Easter weekend with the kids (Stayed at a hotel, his idea) I don't want to intiate contact on this matter, (I believe that would make it to easy for him, I'm not trying to be mean, if he wants this divorce he needs to do the work for it.)<p>Here in South Dakota a divorce can be completed in 60 days, from signing of admission papers. That is coming up soon. Does he still want this divorce or not? Why is he dragging his feet?<p>I did contact him about our taxes, I included a note saying that I hope he enjoys his trip next week to visit his brother, I know that he is apprehensive about seeing any famiily members.<p>How cruel of him to say so many mean and hateful things towards me, tell me that he never loved me and has always loved this OW. I know in my heart that that is fog talk, but he is so adamant when he says there is nothing left for us. I believe him and then he drags his feet like this, what am I to think? I try so hard not to let my hopes get to high but they inch their way back up there. I know that when he finally does repsond it will say how busy it is that he has been at work and such, but if you want a divorce don't you make the time to see to the paper work? I just don't get it!!! Guess I needed to vent some today!!<p>Thanks,
Dawn [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Oh yeah! I almost forgot I have what would be our 21st wedding anniversary coming up on Thursday. UGH!!! Am not sure what I want to do about that yet.<p>Did think about scanning in a picture of WH when we first meet and one of him now with a note saying "the young man I feel in love with and the man that I still love." Don't know that I will do that or not, what is your thought?<p>[ April 07, 2002: Message edited by: daybreak ]</p>

#991546 04/07/02 08:49 PM
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Try not to second quess everything that happens. Let it flow. If he wants a divorce, you can do nothing to stop it. If he can't go through with it, then that is his decision. Try to focus on what you need to do to have a happy and fulfilled life. Move forward and if things change, you will see what to do. <p>Anniversary time is HARD!!!!! I did not do well that day. I was so heavy with pain that day and I sent an e-mail to OW to tell her not to forget to wish (WS) a happy 33rd Anniversary. Then I also e-mailed WS about some feelings about how sad this anniversary was. He read it at OW and that made the pain deeper for me. He was not happy with my e-mails so I would not recommend any outbursts unless you really feel it will have a meaningful impact on WS. With him moving toward divorce, I don't think trying to get him to show any consideration of your feelings will be possible.<p>I wish you an Anniversary day full of good things and wonderful loving moments with family and friends. I know that day will be tough and I will pray for you to have enough strength for the day.<p>TW

#991547 04/07/02 09:08 PM
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tossed,<p>Thank you for the response. I am moving forward and have done a pretty good job I think. It' just that every once in awhile thing, you know?<p>I wish some one could look into his brain and dissect it and tell me why he does the things that he does. I would just like to understand. I don't dwell on it though.<p>Guess I have been thinking a lot lately as I have a friend at school that has kids the same ages as my youngest two that was just diganosed with terminal cancer and has 2-4 months to live and as my youngest daughter and I were talking on how we could help this little girl, it hit me!! Sue has no control over what is happening to her family this is not a choice that she made (she is a christian) un-like my WH who chose to do this to his family. It's sad to realize that she has two kids that are going to finish growing up with only memories of their mom.<p>Again thanks, for the response.<p>How are you doing?<p>Dawn
[img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

#991548 04/07/02 09:14 PM
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oops double post<p>[ April 07, 2002: Message edited by: daybreak ]</p>


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