Everytime I think things are OK and I will get through this, something else happens to bring me back down. Yesterday, my husband called me and asked me if my daughter had friends over the night before. I said yes she had two friends over. Well he proceeds to tell me that Julie's car and his car were vandalized (boo hoo!) and Julie heard a lot of noise coming from our house and thought Valerie and her friends probably did it! HOW DARE SHE BLAME MY DAUGHTER! I was so angry at her and at him because he though she could have done it too!!! I told him how angry I was and he denied thinking she did it. But IMHO if he didn't believe she had anything to do with it he would not have called me to see if she was home and if she had friends over. I know Val didn't do it because I was still up when it supposedly happened. I heard nothing and Val and her friends were in my living room watchig TV. Luckily for her she had me as an aliby! sorry this is getting long. Just needed to vent. I am still reeling. I had to spend the day with him and his family so I am wound up from that too. TWO MORE MONTHS AND I WILL BE OUT OF HERE AND IT CAN'T COME FAST ENOUGH!!
BH

UN-believable... I can't wait til you can get the heck outta there! HUGS to you! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Hi BH,<p>Your H has to appear to believe whatever OW wants in order to continue getting serviced.<p>OW is at the helm of a ship called Infidelity, it's cargo is lies and deceit. And your H is a willing passenger whose brains are in his pants right now. <p>Those two are so paranoid and stricken with guilt, pointing fingers every which way. Partners in crime.<p>Can't wait for you to get the heck outta there, Hon. They won't have anyone to blame any longer. Which will leave them looking at each other for the first time in the glaring bright light of REALITY. <p>Best,
Jo<p>[ April 13, 2002: Message edited by: Resilient ]</p>

<<<OW is at the helm of a ship called Infidelity, it's cargo is lies and deceit. And your H is a willing passenger whose brains are in his pants right now.>>><p>Thanks for the first laugh I've had in weeks! That's a great definition.
[img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img]

BTDT & Jo, Thanks guys...I can't wait to get outta here either! I got one step closer today, my house passed inspection..YEAH!!! <p>Jo, I love the analogy!! What a great way with words you have! You are absolutely right, they are both looking at anyone but themselves to blame. What a pair! <p>PsychoB - Ditto!! <p>My car broke down today on the highway. We had to call my darling husband. Of course, he was not available to help because he took Julie up to OUR place in Maine. So here I am broken down in the middle lane of a highway and my husband is off having fun with his little s**t GF. ARGHHH!
Tommorrow will be a better day..RIGHT??
BH

BH-<p>Just hang in there, every day is one day closer to your total release from all of this garbage. I can tell you that as soon as you put some distance between the three of you, the easier it will get.<p>I think you are doing great! To be able to handle this situation with such grace and dignity is to be commended. I know that there are a lot of better days ahead for you.<p>You know that thier lives together are not all fun and games like they thought it would be or else they wouldnt be doing some of the things they are. Hold your head high and be proud of yourself.

Thanks LHS! It has been a difficult road but I do feel like the end of this road is near. I know once I get away from here, I will be able to heal and get on with my life. I just happened to see them together right before I came in the house. It makes my skin crawl!! I am a little depressed tonight so I am not going to say too much. Sometimes, I just go on and on. Well, thanks LHS and I am going to read some threads now and hope to see an update on you!
BH

BH,
I was just lurking around, and really have nothing to add except my support. You are a brave soul to be next door to this travesty and still be sane...god bless you...you deserve the very best!

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr> Your H has to appear to believe whatever OW wants in order to continue getting serviced.<p>OW is at the helm of a ship called Infidelity, it's cargo is lies and deceit. And your H is a willing passenger whose brains are in his pants right now. <hr></blockquote><p>Oh My I LOVE THIS ANALOGY too!!! whooohoooo!!! That was GOOD.<p>BROKENHEARTED:
I am so sorry for your pain. How hurtful and hateful!!! As for OW, just wait till what goes around comes around!!!! It'll happen!<p>Take heart, your time is almost up there.
Mikkey

Thanks Spacecase and Mikkey,
I don't always feel sane, but I try to act it! There are times when I feel I should win the academy award! My tongue has more teeth marks in than a dog bone because I am constantly biting it trying not to LB!! Sometimes I think why do I care if I LB or not, my love bank is depleted anyway. but then I remember that I am working on me now, by not LB'ing I am being a better me! I do feel like I am in a prison and my time is almost up.
Thanks everyone for the kind words of support. I can't tell you how much it means to me.
BH

I for one think they deserve a little vandalism... on their cars.. nothing too bad! But not from you, no lb's , right! I would probably pay my kids for doing it! and I would give them alibies to mr. liar and his slu+ anyway! <p>I am sorry he had the NERVE to call you up... he is losing so much, and he will soon find out.. when LIFE changes... keep records of that maine visit... you know you have the right to recover monies spent on ow while you are married.. and that is quite a letdown.. your place... I would take it or insist on it being sold just for that! I'm sure you will get it...<p>Your no lb's will make you look like a saint in divorce court... so another reason for it.<p>I am sorry he is so much still in your face... it is truly that his brain is in his pants.. and what a firends.... miss julie... do you have a nick name for her? What a tramp! I am so sorry for all of this, and that your kids... actually see the err of their father in front of them... are they in counseling. i am sorry I have not cked in on you in a mile .. you are an inspiration.. You deserve such a better man... and I hope you get a beautiful new home that you love out of this!@ get something you really really like.<p>Do you work during the day and at least get away fro m this some?
I hope so... hugs... HONEY [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img]

Thanks Honey for the encouragement! I do work full time and I am so glad that I do. Who would ever think that your work place would end up being your safe place? I certainly never thought mine would. but it is the only time I know that I won't run into either of them. Right now my kids are not in counseling, but it is something we are talking about. They don't want to right now, but I think it would be good for them. Maybe once we are out of here, they will realize that they need it. Thanks again Honey. i have been keeping tabs on you too. You are doing great! You seem much stronger than you did before. Keep up the good work!
Hugs to you too!
BH