My husband and I were talking last night and I said I was interested in hearing more about his feelings and needs. He said that I treat him good and do everything for him. This actually scared me in a way. I believe one of his big needs is admiration. He felt bad about himself and couldn't get enough ego boosting. She made him feel young and important and he was "the man". He admits he felt bad about himself and is going for counselling so I'm hoping there he will learn how to get his boosts in other ways.
I've tried to compliment him etc. but do you have any suggestions on other ways I can meet his admiration needs or do you think it's a bottomless pit?<p>[ April 15, 2002: Message edited by: roseyhue37 ]</p>

roseyhue37,<p>Admiration is one of my WH's biggest EN's too. He hasn't taken the questionaire, but I know it is.<p>I also realized that I didn't know how to talk so he would listen. If he needed Admiration, how could I best do that so HE would notice. From a recommendation of a close friend, I took a test of sorts (on me) and then I did one for WH (he hasn't done yet) of how I thought he would answer.<p>Then I had a short (and inexpensive counselling session over the phone with Bill Curnow. He taught me how to relate to my WH. For the amount of contact that I have with WH, it is nothing short of a miracle. <p>Bill Curnow & the TAP test can be found at Life Coaching International <p>The way Bill described my WH's need for admiration is this - "Think of it as putting gas in your car, you need it to run. That's the way your WH is about admiration, he needs it to run. So, first put the gas in the car (admiration) and it will run better (and it has!)<p>god Bless

Thanks WillGetThruThis. I got a chuckle out of your sig "supposedly just friends" as I can relate to it. I will keep plugging at it and am doing the best I can. I hope that will be enough.