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Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 150
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OP
Member
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 150 |
weve been doing good so why do I push? My WH goes the gym every morning - well this morning I asked him to stay in bed and have sex with me and he turned me down, I freaked out and started asking him what was going on, why did I feel like he was pushing me away again, was he talking to the OW again? I could go on and on- His answer was that I'm pushing him too hard and that I'm smothering him again and that he thought he was being nice to me. After he got home from the gym I told him it was a good thing I was tough and stubborn or he might just succeed in pushing me away and he stated that he was more stubborn - at this point I go get in the shower but keep thinking to myself, what the heck did he mean by that comment - He is more stubborn? So when I get out of the shower I ask him by what he meant? that I while I was trying to make our M work he was being more stubborn on not making it work? His answer - "I dont know what I meant" <p>Ok - so I'm driving him crazy - now what do I do to make it right? I just feel like crying - things have been really good and I do something like this and LB away everything I've worked so hard to get back
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Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,074
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Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,074 |
What you are feeling is so normal. I went thru that too. I know it is hard and this is still very recent. I do not think you did anything wrong. My WS also retracted sexually at first and little by litte our relationship has improved. He may be depressed. Review Plan A. Keep focused on yourself and kids and time will help. Plan A is key right now. Also review his EN. To keep your marriage together at this point, you may be doing all the work. Hang in there, because it should get easier and better with time. Just my 2 cents. Others may have better advice, but I want you to know that I felt the same way you do at the same point post D-Day.
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Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 150
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OP
Member
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 150 |
its nice to know that there are others that feel the same way - 1/2 my fear is that our sex life had improved greatly in the past month or so and now this - so him pulling away a little has me really frightened, and I actually told him that to which he says he understands. I want to call him so bad right now but know that it will only make it worse.
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