I would like to give a little history on Mr. and Mrs. Funk. We meet in HS and the sparks did not immediately fly. When we first hooked up I was in a pretty serious relationship at the time. I continued to see my now W as my feelings for her began to grow. Eventually after going back and forth between the two girls (cheating on one or the other) I ended up with my now W. This all occurred around 1989-91. I was very young 19 –21 years old. My ex girlfriend was much older than me and was more like a mother figure at times. W and me started to really get serious, as I finally had to make a choice between one or the other. I was happy with my decision and W was happy also. We dated exclusively for around two years. I guess around 1994 I found out now W was cheating on me. She left me and dated another guy for a year or so. During that year I called Now W every once in a while to see how she felt. At first she was very firm “ leave me alone” all the time. As months went by I called her again. After a while she was OK talking to me. She cheated on her other boyfriend with me. Soon after she broke up with her boy friend and we started dating again. To me life was great. I knew that she was the one I wanted to be with. She said the same. I moved into her apt and life was good. About 2 years into the rekindled relationship she cheated on me again. This time it was the mailman. I was devastated. I lost my temper and beat up the OM pretty bad. I went to jail for 30 days along with 2 years probation and anger management courses. The AMC courses were awesome and I am really glad I went. Now I get out Of jail and I did everything I could to forget about My now W. That summer for me was just the bar scene and dating allot. I had sex with 9 women in one summer. It seemed I could not find anyone who could fulfill me sexually or mentally as well as my now W. I started dating a really nice girl and I was feeling pretty good about things. Then All it took was one phone Call from my now W and I broke up with other girl and started back With my now W. This time we were both older and wiser so we thought. We said OK we have been through the dating Scene. We both have been in many other relationships. It’s obvious that we belong together. So after seeing each other for a few years, we bought a house together. Two years later we got married. So now you are pretty much up to date. As you Know we have been married for 2.5 years. Ws has recently had an A. Now that you have read all that here is my Question.<p>1. With so much cheating/Infidelity in the relationship can counseling really change behaviors in people. My Ws Knows the difference between right and wrong. When tempted it seems she does not have the discipline to turn away or the hindsight to think of the past and how we always end up back together. I keep telling her thing are different now. We are married and if this doesn’t work there is no going back.
2. Does anyone have any ideas as to why this keeps happening?
3. Am I just an Idiot for taking her back all the time?
4. She stated lastnight that she feels like she has to hit rock bottom to realize what it is she is throwing out. How can she hit rock bottom while living with me. Is ther anyway she can start to think rationally without hitting rock bottom?