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Why Disclosure in important
#995323 04/21/02 10:17 AM
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 119
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DesertReStart
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DesertReStart
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This is to start a new thread about Disclosure from the WS to BS. I have read severl great posts about why the WS gets angry when the BS asks for details (can someone link over to it and tell me how they did it). And in another thread we were talking about some of the results of doing the disclosure, early and later.<p>I thought it would help others if the discussion was not buried in a thread.<p>I have one question to strart. How do you explain the WS how important it is to you (the BS) to know details that the WS thinks "don't matter". Is timing important (fog issue) Ok, that's two questions [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>DRS
Re: Why Disclosure in important
#995324 04/21/02 10:25 AM
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 967
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maggierose Offline
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My H also didn't really get this until he read the following:<p>Torn Asunder (great book)
'Shattered Vows' at findarticles.com<p>They both do an excellent job of explaining why the spouse HAS to know about the affair in order to process and heal. The book also explains that the WS has to feel all of the BS pain, anger, rage, etc. in order for it NOT to happen again.<p>It helped my H to see things in a whole new light. Before he probably thought I was punishing him, now he knows it's necessary.
Re: Why Disclosure in important
#995325 04/21/02 11:20 AM
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 4,140
Island of Misfit Toys, AZ, USA
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Desert,<p>Here is the link you are looking for:<p>"Why Does WS Become Enraged When I Ask For Truth?"<p>http://www.marriagebuilders.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic&f=37&t=017050<p>You may need to cut and paste it into your browser's window, since it's so long.<p>Also, *After the Affair* is another very good book on this subject.<p>good luck
Psycho_B***h

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