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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 46
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 46 |
Wh is coming to house tommorrow to do stuff and see daughter. He moved out last week to live with OW. He has been cakeeater for months and I had enough. He decided to move in with her to see if it would work. Told him I loved him but would not be here forever.
We've only talked a little. He doesn't sound all that happy but wants to see this thing through.I told him this was a sick addiction, he agreed. I also said only way out would be to move so he never have to see her again. He said I have been thinking about that. He still sounds so confused and his voice cracks and breaks up when we talk.
I dn't know if it would be better to hang around tomorrow or to leave. I am afaid if I leave my daughter might get upset. I also think it may be better to leave otherwise he could cakeeat forever if he gets me to meet some of his needs. Any suggestions?
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Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 2,868
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Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 2,868 |
KF,
It's hard to tell without knowing more of the story.
How long has this been going on? When was DDay?
Plan A in place for how long? Does he say he wants to fix the M?
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 1,145
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 1,145 |
Faith:<p>I may be off base here, but I would recommend you not be there when your WH comes for visit with D. He needs to continue to see the reality of what life would be like WITHOUT you. I agree that if you're there it may seem too much like you're fulfilling a need of his (no matter how small) and allowing him to continue to cake-eat. <p>I'd find some really fun or indulgent thing to do for yourself that day. You deserve it anyway!<p>That's just my opinion....other, more experienced MBer's may have a different take.<p>God Bless,<p>at peace
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 46
Member
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Member
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 46 |
Thanks spacecase and at peace. D-Day was in October but affair continued while he was pledging to work on Marriage. After discovery of it continuing in March told him to make choice. He chose Marriage but after 3 weeks says he couldn't stand no contact. So he moved in with her. He still has no idea what he wants but at least now they are forced to face reality of what life with be like together. Did good Plan A for 6 months I think it is probably not a good idea to be here the whole time. I may leave a little while after he gets here and meet my girlfriend. Thanks<p>[ April 26, 2002: Message edited by: keeping faith ]</p>
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