I can barely contain myself at the moment......although I know it is dangerous to be so excited!!!! My XH just called. I haven't spoken to him on the phone since last Thursday....when I major LBed on the phone!!! I sent him two e-mails this week - one telling him that I was sorry and I realized it had been wrong for me to move away.....and that I can't sit here and say I'll do everything to reconcile and refuse to move, and if he wanted me to, I would move back with the kids. The second e-mail I sent, I apologized at length for several things I have done over the last 2 years.....lying, being deceitful, having an affair, not reconciling when he wanted to before the divorce, divorcing him, moving, delaying admitting I was wrong and hence delaying the possibility of reconciliation, etc., etc., etc. I did not make any statements at all accusing him....I took complete responsibility for all of my horrid actions and apologized for each and every one of them. I felt so much better having sent it to him. It was long overdue. <p>Anyway.....I haven't called him...just waited and prayed and prayed and prayed!!! He just called. Asked me what I wanted to do this weekend. Said he was taking boys to the air show and then asked if I wanted to go!!!! I can't believe it!!! I could hardly contain myself. I tried not to act too emotional about it. I just said "I would love to go" and then before we hung up, I said "thank you for asking me to go". <p>Please pray for me not to be overbearing this weekend - to give him space, but also to let him know how great it is to be spending the weekend together as a family. <p>I know I shouldn't be overly encouraged about this......but it's at least a small step forward, especially for him. I know he is incredibly bitter and hurt. Pray that I do the right things and don't blow it.<p>Thank you!

NC - You will do fine. Take the time for what it is and enjoy it. Don't expect anything, don't start any conversations about the past (affair wise), let him start them if he wants to talk. <p>Big plus - your thank you that you offered for him asking you to go. That will help he to feel appreciated, and I applaud you for remembering to do that.<p>Treat it like a first date. Smiles and fun. I wish you the best and will keep you in my thoughts this weekend. Enjoy yourself. Remember to think before you talk - this will help avoid LBs. <p>Always take into consideration his feelings about what you are about to say - it really works. Pretty soon you will have the conversation thing down and LBs will be on their way out the window. Don't be defensive, you don't have to convince him of anything or make him like you - he'll like you for just being you, flaws, mistakes and all. Trust me, my husband does. [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] <p>My best to you. Take care, and have fun. [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img]

NC20505,<p>How did your weekend go? I have read several of your posts, but didn't have time to post to you.<p>Just perhaps a comment that you probably already know. Give this plenty of time and take baby steps. It seems since your H did reach out and send you the photo's that something is there.<p>What is also there is a tremendous amount of hurt and pain. But, what you may not realize is that his self-esteem is probably pretty shot. Here is where the new woman in his life has a hugh advantage over you. She is good for his self-esteem, you will remind him of his failures.<p>Yes, HIS failures. I realize you feel (and rightly so) that you have much to apologize for, but I suspect you don't realize how what you did simply undermined your exH. I would bet that he feels like a total failure.<p>This is important to keep in mind. As you do your plan A, also stop to look at it from his side of things. What would you feel like if you were in his place? What would you like him to do for you?<p>NC, there is hope for your situation but there is a lot of rebuilding to do. If it comes along further, let him read some of the books you have read if he hasn't already.<p>Just remember tiny steps are required and there will be a two steps forward one step back if you do start to redevelop your relationship. THere are big time trust issues to over come.<p>God Bless,<p>JL

Will continue to pray for you this week. I know how you feel, its so hopeful. Hang in there if and when it starts feeling not so hopeful. Bite your tongue and try not to let the 'feelings' take control of your mouth - mine began to tonight but I managed to keep them under control. <p>So how did it go?<p>Dancer