I looked up some movies that I thought H and I might enjoy seeing, and asked him if we could go this evening..."> I looked up some movies that I thought H and I might enjoy seeing, and asked him if we could go this evening...">

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Joined: Aug 1999
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Well, so much for the idea of "dating."<P>I looked up some movies that I thought H and I might enjoy seeing, and asked him if we could go this evening. He wasn't very enthusiastic, but said OK. Well, he hasn't mentioned it today, and is off in another county dove-hunting with some buddies. I'm pretty sure he won't be home until too late to go out.<P>I've been trying to get rid of some clutter, but I've been on the downhill leg of the roller coaster ride all day and not doing too good at the housecleaning thing--one of H's needs that I really need to work on. I just feel so overwhelmed much of the time, which brings my productivity to a halt.<BR> <BR>So, I could get my butt up from here as soon as I finish drying my hair (just in case H remembers about the movies) and clean like hell, or I could take that nice fat check my mom gave me for my birthday next week and go shopping. I even considered going to the movies by myself, but that's not what I want to do. But, if I go "do my thing," I'll be gone if H does happen to remember our "date."<P>I feel like I'm still so unimportant to him.<P>Thursday night, we went out to the bar and got to talking about vacations and second honeymoon cruises. H said that he didn't care about taking a cruise (??? he's always talked about us taking one!!), but that he'd like to go to Alaska and maybe take one of those cruises. I said that going to Alaska would be nice, but I wouldn't want to go and spend the whole time visiting his brother. Then the topic came around to a group of us all getting together and going on a cruise and how much fun it would be. I said, "That would be fun, but not for a second honeymoon." He said, "Well, stuff like that isn't fun unless you go with a crowd." I said (in as carefree a voice as I could muster), "Well, let's just invite half the town when we go, then." Yeah, I know. I'm too sensitive, but it hurts my feelings that he is so damn insensitive. Anyhow, I didn't want to lovebust or act angry, so I just shut up. H noticed, I think, because he started giving me what he used to call "love pinches" under my arm. I realized that I had gotten a little withdrawn, so I responded nicely, and things went OK after that.<P>I guess what ticks me off is that he apparently thinks we can go on just like we've been doing for so long--with little or no changes on his part. Just do enough to keep the ol' lady from getting p***ed. Sometimes, I think I came home too soon.<P>Heck, I don't even think I make sense to myself, so I'm going to finish cleaning the bathroom and soak in the whirlpool. If he shows up in time to go to the movies, wonderful. If he doesn't, I'm going shopping before my birthday money burns a hole in my pocket.<P>I'll bet he doesn't even go to church with me tomorrow, either.

Joined: Jun 1999
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Sweet Pea, it sounds as though your tired of waiting around for him to have a life? Maybe. I think if you want to go out then you should go. If he says anything to you about leaving then say, I didn't get the feeling you wanted to go and so nothing was definate. I didn't want to do nothing special today so I went out. I know, it sounds hurtful. But sometimes, and I don't think they do it on purpose, they just don't think about taking us women out. I think sometimes you need to be more independent which kinda wakes them up to the fact that your not waiting around for them anymore and you can do your own thing without them. I know that theres lots of times my H wouldn't take me places and it really was a waste of my time sitting around waiting for him. Then I started just getting up and leaving him, kids and all, without an explaination. He finally woke up when he said, where did you go? and I answered out, just like you do to me, did I mess up your plans? (very even tempered!!!!) He gawked!!! Literally dropped mouth open and couldn't say anything. Never did answer him, he would be surprised to know I was parked around the corner crying out my eyes! But now, he thinks twice about leaving me alone for a whole day and not spending some quality time with me! Good Luck, I am praying for you!<P>------------------<BR>Chick's<P>You won't see things until your ready to not be blind!<BR>

Joined: Aug 1999
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Chick's,<BR> I've done that, too. I was doing it pretty often--let him think I was going out to clubs, and he didn't like it one bit.<P> It's almost 7 pm here, and I'm going OUT!!!<BR>Just as soon as my low-nect tank top gets dry.<P> He seems to be thinking, "Well, I admitted I cheated, and she needs to get over it. In the meantime, I'm just going to keep on doing whatever I want to do."<P> Well, he needs to have another little think!!<P> I'm not going to say one word about his not showing up for our "date." I may just tell him that I started out going to the movies and wound up in a bar. Truth. I did start out thinking I would just go on to the movies, but that wouldn't be much fun by myself. So, I'm going to this new bar and grill in a nearby town, have supper and maybe a drink or two, talk to people, and then drink a couple of Diet Cokes, and come home----LATE!!!<BR>

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Sweet Pea,<P>What did you see? Movies are sometimes the best dates when you are in a situation like this, during a movie you can hold hands, and not address issues - because you are both thinking about something else - together. If he missed this opportunity he is a nitwit!<P>What did you see? What did you buy yourself!<P>Watched 3 movies last night... The Juror, Mighty Joe Young and Payback. Just what we needed! Violence! <P>Have a nice day.


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